::Farah Bella Uncut,Uncensored,Confession of an emotional unstable self-proclaimed Diva::

Forever and Always

2011-08-29T09:06:00.002+08:00

My love Jeff Wong @ NZ. I love you xx

Forever and Always: From Me to Jeff

When I'm with you,eternity is a step away,

My love continues to grow

with each passing day.

This treasure of love,

I cherish within my soul,

How much I love you...

you'll never really know.

You bring a joy to my heart

I've never felt before,

With each touch of your hand

I love you more and more.

Whenever we say good-bye,

whenever we part,

Know I hold you dearly

deep inside my heart.

So these seven words

I pray you hold true,

"Forever And Always

I Will Love You"

HURT

2011-08-28T23:48:00.001+08:00

IM HURT!!

I AM FUCKING HURTTTTTT!!!

I AM BLOODY FUCKING HURT!!!!

I AM A DUMB IDIOT!

YES I AM A FUCKING IDIOT!!!

FUCKING KILL ME ALREADY!!!

FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!

BYE

Joke of the Day! LOL

2011-08-19T10:10:00.002+08:00

Bottle of Wine(Women will LOVE this one!)

A woman and a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, cold Monday morning; it's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them is hurt. God works in mysterious ways.

After they crawl out of their cars, the man is yelling about women Drivers. The woman says, 'So, you're a man. That's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left, but we're unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should be friends and live in peace for the rest of our days.'

Flattered, the man replies, 'Oh yes, I agree completely, this must be a Sign from God! But you're still at fault...women shouldn't be allowed to Drive.' The woman continues, 'And look at this, here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune. She hands the bottle to the man.

The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle And then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle, puts the cap back on and hands it back to the man. The man asks, 'Aren't you having any?' The woman replies, 'No. I think I'll just wait for the police...

' MORAL OF THE STORY:Women are clever, evil bitches. Don't mess with them.

_______________________________________________

ONLY A MOTHER WOULD KNOW...

~A Cup of Tea ~

One day my mother was out, and my dad was in charge of me. I was maybe 2 1/2 years old. Someone had given me a little 'tea set' as a gift, and it was one of my favorite toys.

Daddy was in the living room engrossed in the evening news when I brought him a little cup of 'tea', which was just water. After several cups of tea and lots of praise for such yummy tea, my mom came home. My dad made her wait in the living room to watch me bring him a cup of tea, because it was 'just the cutest thing!'

Mum waited, and sure enough, here I came down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy; and she watched him drink it up. Then she said, (as only a mother would know), "'Did it ever occur to you that the only place she can reach to get water is the toilet?"

_________________________________________________________

Pak Abu Raya Cookies/Hampers

2011-08-19T08:50:00.002+08:00

OH MY GOD! WHAT MORE CAN I SAY?!!!

I ate the Pineapple Tart Cookies and tears rolled down my eyes! -LITERALLY!

OH GOD! then i ate their chocolate chip cookies... Tears were on my cheeks ...

THEN i had their cornflake cookies ... i was bawling in the shop LOL

IT WAS THAT GOOD YO!!

And i loooooooooooooooooooooooooved the deco of the shop and they have choices of GORGEOUS hampers that you can choose from - they do delivery as well!!

Pak Abu's shop is located at Bangsar Village Shopping Mall, i came across the shop because of my friend Siti wanted to go and find some awesome looking hampers to her clients.

I wish that i can send some to New Zealand. But Jeff made me promise not to get him anything after not receiving the ciggarettes that i ordered for him via online :(

I know that he'd loooooooooooooooove all the cookies @ Pak Abu.

God i am missing Jeff <3 xxx

Cleaning my FB friend list

2011-08-18T13:08:00.002+08:00

Hello!!

Just updating that i'm gonna do a spree cleaning on my FB friend list.

I have just been told there are some losers stalking my YouTube account and making such a big Hoo Haa (FUSS) about one of my video.

Apparently they said i was doing it within the BAU.

HELL NO!

I am tired of people thinking im THAT STUPID?! To do recording during working hours? MY working hours? SERIOUSLY!

I would usually do it after my working hours finishes.. Too bad there are times i'd be in the office still after that, yeah so we're operating for 24 hours. OBVIOUSLY there will be other people working still!

So, im deleting some people off from my FB and to set my You Tube to private. I dont want some other people to go and STALK ME! I just want my FRIENDS to look at my update!

Fucking stalkers!

BYE!

Ramadhan

2011-08-04T12:32:00.003+08:00

Happy Ramadhan to all!!

My first Ramadhan in 5 years without Jeff :)

How i miss him!!

Sweet Jeff who would fast (without food but with water lol) with me and go to Bazar Ramadhan with me to get food. Or to go and break fast somewhere and watch movie right after :)

October is just around the corner... I can't wait!

This year's Raya wont be as fun. Money will be spent like nobody's business. ARGH!!!

Oh well. Happy Ramadhan to all!! <3 <3

My Love

2011-07-30T16:44:00.004+08:00

This is toooooo cuuute!!!

Chatting via GoogleChat on my Blackberry with Jeff @ NZ

My Love Jeff looking soo HOT!

Jeff Sayang - so kurus now with his new headphone :)

__________________________________________________________

Ok that's all for now folks :)

I'm off to a BBQ makan-makan @ Sofea/RJ/Ahmad's place.

Gonna swim swim with baby Daniel too :)

Me - on a tiring day ~ i look sooo pale!!! Missing Jeff so much! <3 <3

Baby Qaid Daniel :)

2011-07-30T15:43:00.002+08:00

Pictures of me with Baby Daniel - (Azril + Ain's baby boy)

Awwwwwwwwwww he looks like Shin Chan!!!!

Can't wait to see you in a few minutes! Swimming!!! xxx

with Uncle Aidan

With Uncle Azeem

Fun Night Out :)

2011-07-30T13:15:00.006+08:00

Fun night out at a Gay Club in the heart of Kuala Lumpur (La Queen) LOL. This was taken uhmm couple of weeks ago...

Was there only for couple of hours, celebrating friendship! LOL

FYI: Picture of me with the beer - was just for the sake of taking pictures! Cos i don't drink Beer.

Picture with the tequila shot - i admit i had 1 but only 1 the whole night :)

Why do i still look fat? I've lost some weight! FUCK!!! LOL

I wish that Jeff was there that night :(

Was missing him tremendously..... It has been such a long time since i went to the clubs without him beside me....

OCTOBERRRRRRRRRRRR!!! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! Hahahhahaa

So who was there that night?

Me, Siti, Sofea, Mochie, Bubu, RJ, Ahmad :)

Sofea, Me, Siti

Mochie, Me, CT

Bubu, Me, Mochie

Bubu, Me, Mochie again :)

Bubu, Siti, Mochie

The Sweetest Email :)

2011-07-30T12:15:00.003+08:00

Awwwwwwwwwwwww the sweetest!!

I LOVE YOUUUUU !!!

YES - You can hate me too. Fuck OFF!

2011-07-20T12:31:00.002+08:00

I seriously feel like shit today and for once it's not because of how bad i am missing Jeff.

1) I am having such a horrible week as my flu is still with me. I haven't been feeling well for a week + now

2) I had 2 hours of sleep lastnight

3) I had lots of hardcore complaint customers demanding for all sort of shits!

4) I am being attacked by my boss because of my friend's absent

5) So called friend pissed me off big time for not being understanding.

Let me talk bout (1)
I have been having this awful flu and due to this my nose is itchy like fuck and running. I am tired of applying oilment and also Vicks on my nose. Worked only for a while! ARGHGHHHHH I AM SO STRESSED!!!!

(2)
I dont know why i only 2 hours of sleep. I was sleepy but my body was pretty much in a hyper mode. I slept about 3am and woke up 5:15am. I wentto the toilet to pee and i couldnt go to sleep again! I TRIED!!!! So i ended up going to Youtube and uploaded a video and showered @ 6:30am get ready for work

I got stuck in the traffic for 45 mins .... bad day....

(3)
I just have no energy to type about this... FUCK is all i can type for now..

(4)
My boss is attacking me asking my friend's wherebouts. I am stuck! I can't be explaining bout this much either cos i just feel so tired and dissapointed. I AM VERY EXTREMELY SAD

(5)
Mochie - is pissed with me - like wtf? Then i found out its cos of yesterday when i was stressed running around like a dog cos of a complaint he told mewhy i wasnt downstairs for smoking pity our other friend waiting for me.

That blew me off completely. Cos i remember telling Bubu i couldnt go down smoking as i was stuck in a complaint right when i was ready to go for a smoke.He caught me at a wrong time so i told him to be understanding lah.. apahal kesian orang pulak habis aku ni duduk goyang kaki ke kat kerusi aku tu.

Yes i know he's only saying that but AS I SAID he got me at the wrong time.

So yesterday after work i called him wanted to apologize lah - friends what biasa ah lepaskan marah, and also to bring the handbag that he took from me. I want to give to my sister.

But didn't answer - i didnt feel anything cos he rarely answers his phone pun.
then today his boss told me that he merajuk/marah dgn me bout yesterday.

WTF? AKU MMG MENGAMOK GILA OK!

PEGI MAMPOS LAH KAU!

AKU MALAS LAYAN ORANG SAIKO SEMUA!
___
_____________

So because of all these 5 events happening to me within 2 hours today i feel so horrible and i cried. I am too stressed out.

I hate all of you for making me feel this bad

Thank you. BYE!

=)

2011-07-14T20:49:00.002+08:00

My Horoscope for today

You may be questioning something or someone that you have come to rely on. It could seem that out of the blue you have reason for doubt. But that is probably just the cynic in you rearing its ugly head, Capricorn. You know that you find it hard to trust at times. Even when someone has earned your friendship, you still question that person's motivations once in awhile. But what you are facing now is genuine. Tell your inner cynic to take a vacation, because you don't want to be influenced to mistrust something special.

____________________________________

Jeff sent me an email earlier. I think it's a love song lyric.. Awwwwwwwww he's such a darling. I love you hon with all my heart :)

This is the lyric :

if i had to live without u near me
the days would be so empty
the nights would seem so long

with u i see forever so early
i might have been in love before
but it never felt this strong

our dreams are young and we both know
they will take us wherever we wanna go

nothing's gonna change my love for u
u oughta know by now how much i love u
one thing u can be sure of is i will never ask for more than ur love
the world may change my whole life through but nothing's gonna change my love for u

Awwwwwwww i love youuuuu JEFF WONG!!! <3 <3 xoxoxoxo

JOKE OF THE DAY!

2011-07-14T19:20:00.003+08:00

OH MY GOD! SERIOUSLY I LAUGHED SO HARD! ENJOY! =)

SOALAN SEJARAH………

1. Siapakah yang membuka Melaka?
a. Param
b. Parameswari
c. Paramugari Terlampau
d. Parameswara
e. Parang Kontot

2. Pada tahun 1771, seorang penjelajah Inggeris telah tiba di sebuah kawasan yang dikenali sebagai New Hebrides, siapakah dia?
a. Kapten Hook
b. Kapten Crook
c. Kapten Cook
d. Kapten Cool
e. Kapten Boleh

3. Siapakah yang pernah menjadi pemerintah Sarawak?
a. Brooke Shields
b. James Beruk
c. James Bond
d. Sapok Bikie.
e.James Brooke

4. Siapakah yang membuka Pulau Pinang?
a. Torch Light
b. Traffic Light
c. Francisca Peters
d. Light and Easy
e. Francis Light

5. Salah seorang pahlawan melayu terbilang...
a. Tuk Janggut
b. Tuk Misai
c. Tuk Sideburn
d. Tuk Misai A Galak
e. Tuk Bulu Hidung

6. Pahlawan Melayu di Pahang..
a. Mat Kilau
b. Mat Silau
c. M Daud Kilau
d. Mat Sentul
e. Mat Rempit

7. Siapakah Residen Inggeris di Negeri Perak yang dibunuh oleh Datuk Maharajalela?
a. Jawa Jerongos
b. J.W.W Birch
c. Jay Jay
d. J.W.Marriote.
e.Jawa Rangers

8. Negara manakah yang menjajah Tanah Melayu selepas Portugis?
a. Ayam Belanda
b. Bela Anda
c. Blender
d. Belanda
e. Blunder

9. Apakah antara hantaran yang diminta Puteri Gunung Ledang kepada Sultan Melaka?
a. 7 dulang hati nyamuk
b. 7 dulang tongkeng ayam
c. 7 dulang tahi hidung
d. 7 dulang tahi lalat
e. 7 dulang gigi arnab

10. Siapakah puteri Pahang yang mencintai Hang Tuah?
a. Tun Mahathir
b. Tan Tin Tun
c. Tun Tak Tahu Eja
d. Tun Teja
e. Arnold Susahanakeja

11. Siapakah puteri Negeri China yang berkahwin dengan Sultan Melaka?
a. Puteri Hang Li Po
b. Puteri Kepala ***** Hang!
c. Puteri Opah Hang!
d. Puteri Hang Go Poh
e. Puteri Hang Cing

12. Ikan apakah yang melanggar Singapura?
a. Ikan Bilis
b. Ikan Masin
c. Ikan Kembung Masak Asam
d. Ikan kekek mak iloi-iloie.
e.Ikan Todak

13. Siapakah Ketua Kominis Malaya?
a. CIMB Bank
b. Chin Peng
c. Soh Chin Aun
d. Chim Pan Zee
e. Chin Chau

______________________________________________________________

HAHAHAHHAHA FUNNY!!!

SINCE WHEN JUSTIN BIEBER'S A WOMAN?! LOL

Tired ..

2011-07-13T23:55:00.005+08:00

My horoscope for today

You have two choices regarding the path your life is taking now, Capricorn. You could give in to the anxiety that you've been feeling, and allow it to cause sleepless nights, stress-filled days, and a pervasive fear of what the future holds. Or, you could harness that same powerful energy and use it to your advantage. It's obvious which of these is the better choice. When you start to feel restless and worried, try to find inspiration instead. Transform your fear into hopeful anticipation. Allow your nervousness to manifest as productivity. Turn bad to good. It will take a conscious effort, but when you master this, you will find yourself moving forward toward a bright opportunity.

___________________________

Meaning : I have to stop feeling insecure and just hang on till October.

But honestly since 2 weeks ago it has been wonderful as Jeff been contacting me and we've talked on the phone and googlechat ... I feel much at ease... =)

It's 11:56pm - and im in the office... shrugs.... So sleepy =(

Ok, heading back home now.. When will i get better offer? Better job with awesome pay? :(

I cant wait for my love to come back... I miss you sayang....

The 2 clowns sitting next to me ~

2011-07-12T15:43:00.003+08:00

Mochie + Hani

Today is such a tiring and boring day, In short it's a fucked up day at work.

I slept late last night cos i uploaded 3 new videos at my YouTube, and i woke up quite early as i have an analysis to complete and present later today @ 5:30pm.

But when i entered the office at 8 am, i decided to check my team's performance.

I AM NOT HAPPY!!!!

So i wasted 3 hours in the morning - getting all pissed!!!!!!!!

It's 3:53pm now - I am really tired, I've done with my analysis - but i don't feel like going for the meeting. Shrugs .....

Hani is planning to create her own blog - Mochie is assisting her.

To both Hani and Mochie - thank you for talking and laughing so merrily beside me while sweats coming out from my forehead due to my analysis.

Somehow you guys cheered me up in a stressful way... hmmm yeah... LOL

OK, im done for now. Will continue later.

Oh i have SO much things to update!!! JEFF!!! I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUU!!! xoxoxo

Saturday Out - Massage!!

2011-07-11T23:52:00.001+08:00

Eventhough there was a riot going on in KL i still went for a massage! It was scary though :( But i needed the massage...

Hubby! Come back home fast and make me feel safe again <3

July 8th YouTube =) + Staring Comp Part #1!

2011-07-08T20:22:00.002+08:00

Me - Singing @ YouTube LOL

2011-07-08T19:43:00.002+08:00

Random Video with Siti To Jasvin

2011-07-08T19:41:00.001+08:00

LOL HILLARIOUS!!!! OMG!!!

Funny Video from my YouTube account =)

2011-07-08T19:36:00.002+08:00

Stupid Picture of the Day

2011-07-07T17:36:00.002+08:00

LOL - Joke - Bad English~

2011-07-07T16:01:00.002+08:00

Baby Be Mine

2011-07-04T15:09:00.002+08:00

OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!

I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEW BOOK TO BE RELEASED!!!!!

I'M GONNA ORDER IT VIA AMAZON AND MAIL IT TO NZ TO JEFF SO THAT HE CAN BRING IT BACK TO MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

21ST JULY!!!!! 21ST OF JULYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!! JULY 21ST!!!!!!

OH GODDDDDDDD!!! I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS BOOK SINCE FEBRUARY!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the end.

Happy 3rd Year Anniversary

2011-06-27T22:22:00.004+08:00

The Anniversary Card i sent to Jeff

The I miss you card i sent to Jeff

The cards + postcard

The cards + postcard = dropped off @ Shah Alam

Happy 3rd Year Anniversary to Jeff and I (June 26th)

I love you .. And I miss you so so so much.

So much that I can't explain in words, but every second of my life I pray n pray that u do know n realise just how much.

It saddens me that I can't contact u at all to extand my birthday wish specially to you and also to wish for our 3rd year anniversary.

I knew you on August 2006 and fell in love with you on September 2006 - but we finally became lovers on June 26th 2008.

Thank you for giving me the chance of knowing you and to make me feel loved...

Happy Birthday Jeff Wong

2011-06-23T22:26:00.003+08:00

Happy 31st Birthday to you Jeff Wong Kah Mun

To my dearest, I am sorry that i can't be with you on your special day, but im sure you're having a blast over there.

I just want you to know that i can't put a price on our memories, but i can make them better by adding a few more to the pile.

May you be blessed with happiness, success and unlimited joy.

You may be older today but you're sexier than ever.

My love for you will never cease and you'll always be the one for me.

Im glad you're a part of my life, Happy 31st Birthday my love.

I love you.

FJ Benjamin Warehouse SALE 2011

2011-06-23T11:15:00.003+08:00

25-26 June 2011
FJ Benjamin Warehouse Sales 24 Jun : HSBC Preview Day
Open exclusively to HSBC Credit Card holders only
Enjoy 10% discount off clearance price, when using HSBC cards

Brands Offered
Banana Republic
GAP
GAP Kids
Guess
Guess Kids
La Senza
Paint 8
Raoul
Chronotech Watches
Gc Watches
Guess Watches
Marc Ecko Watches
Nautica Watches
Nike Timing
Nike Vision
VSA Watches

Time :
25 Jun : 10am to 7pm
26 Jun : 10am to 5pm

Location :
Level 2 Orchid Ballroom
Park Royal Hotel
Kuala Lumpur

So don't miss it guys! See you there =)

My Life Cycle? DAMN! LOL

2011-06-23T10:58:00.001+08:00

MY LIFE : According to Liya. LOL!! Damn you!

Joke : LOL! OMAIGOD!

2011-06-23T10:32:00.003+08:00

OH LORD! I LAUGHED TILL I PISSED IN MY PANTS READING THIS OUT LOUD AT WORK! LOL!!!!

Totally brightened up my moody day today =) LOL !!!!

Joke : Damn You Auto-Correct Iphones! (LOL)

2011-06-23T10:20:00.005+08:00

You and I

2011-06-18T15:34:00.005+08:00

Poem - specially dedicated to my Love Jeff Wong xxxx

You and I are connected

in a way that goes beyond romance,

beyond friendship,

beyond what we've ever had before.

It has defied time, distance,

and changes in ourselves

and in our lives.

It has defied every explanation.

Except one:Pure and simply, we're soul mates.

I can't explain, I just feel it.

It's there in the way my spirits lift

whenever we talk.

The sound of your voice brings me home,

in a way I can't explain.

It's in the delight I feel, when we laugh

at exactly the same things.

When I'm with you,

it's like a tiny piece of the universe

shifts into place.

A place it's supposed to be,

and all is right with the world.

These things and so many more,

have made me understand

that this is a once in a lifetime,

forever connection.

A connection that could only exist

between you and me.

And deep in my soul,

I know that our relationship

is a rare gift.

One that brings us

extraordinary happiness

all through our lives.

Working on a SATURDAY!? Wha???

2011-06-18T15:14:00.004+08:00

Liya and Bubu LOL

Yep just wanted to update their picture! LOL! Will write more later! I need my ciggarette and to go and take a leak!

Sigh~ everytime i light a ciggarette i will think bout Jeff...

Hubby ... I miss you.

Saturday!

2011-06-18T11:29:00.005+08:00

My Self Made Picture-Postcard to Jeff <3

Sending out Postcards! Dropped off @Bangsar

LOL! Weee more postcards - dropped off @ PJ (different days than the one @ Bangsar)

(Jeff Wong's Birthday card! Dropped off @ PJ)

Im not gonna update much right now. I just wanted to share these pictures! LOL

Im @ the office and FREAKING HUNGRY! :(

I miss you Jeff ... so so much xxxx

SWIM SWIM SWIM!!!

2011-06-03T00:34:00.002+08:00

I just came back from supper (LOL) after a fun swim activity with Liya, Aidan and Adam!

This is gonna be like twice - a week kinda thingy min. I went swimming last Tuesday too!

Tomorrow me leya and adam planning for another 1 hour of swimming!

It's awesome that im doing something else and to make me feel more relaxed and plus healthy :)

I can't wait for October!!!!

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

I am missing Jeff so so so so much!!!

Ok, it's pretty late and i want to update more but i need my beauty sleep! :(

Gnight all xxx

Jessie > mwah mwah miss u flying kiss all the way to London for u babe :) xx

Questionnaire @ 6:30am :|

2011-05-31T06:58:00.004+08:00

Hello Good Morning!

Yes, it's 6:30 in the morning and i'm already at work. I slept quite early lastnight and naturally i woke up quite early.

I actually had a non pleasent dream for 2 nights in a row.

Which made me not in a pleasent mood when i wake up.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!!!!!

Jasvin said i'm having all of these nightmares because i'm overthinking - again!

Oh please end this suffering!!!!! Ghaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!

So, it's really dark outside - and im wearing yellow. Supposedly to make me look cheerful.

My first yellow dress. I never liked yellow cos i think it's too bright but then i wanted to get something out of usual.

I love colours anyways, so it's all good :)

I'm not sure what else to type this early - so i decide to answer a questionnaire.

:D

1) Which adult person around you do you want to convert into a baby?
There are too many people i'd want to convert into a baby, it'll take more than 3 hours for me to list 'em down. So.. pass!!!

2) Name the teachers whom you would like to have as students in your class and why?
My english teacher when i was in secondary school (Form 4 + Form 5) forgot that toad's name. Why? Because i want to mentally torture her. She's fucking evil!!!!! and such a whore (vomits)

3) Would you like to step into the shoes of Gulliver in ‘Gulliver’s Travels’?
Yes - for new adventure. No - for being a giant.

4) If you could ask for three boons in life, then what would those three boons be?
i - a lover/husband
ii - great family
iii - tie for blackberry + internet (lol)

5) Which alien do you love the most?
Wall-E (alien robot? LOL)

6) What would you like to be- a werewolf or a vampire and why?
I like to be a warewolf because i liked Jacob in twilight (not the actor but the character). But!! Warewolves are hairy :( I dont like being a vampires because of Edward's character (yes again in twilight) But!! Vampires at least looked a bit human~
Conclusion : i dont want to be both! Unless im the Queen of Warewolves of Queen of Vampire. Then i'd choose Queen of Vampire :D

7) Choose your birthday gift- a tail or a pair of horns?
WHAT?!!!! STUPID OPTIONS. NON

8) If you were Harry Potter, then who would you inflate?
All my ex's. Where can i learn this spell?

9) Where would you prefer to hang out- on the clothesline or the tree?
tree. House tree is ok - but then the mosquitos.. yikes!

10) Which fruit do you resemble the most?
Ahhh!!!!!!! I dont know... hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm i dont look like a fruit!!!!

11) What do want to be in life- a giver or a taker?
little bit of both.

12) Which toy of yours do you want to come alive?
NON! That'd be scary!!!! :( Oh wait! Carebears? LOL

13) If you were to be born again, then what animal do you want to be?
NON. We live only once.

14) Which movie imitates your life the best?
URGH!! NEXT QUESTION!!!

15) Who is more frightening- your wife or your boss?
I dont have a wife so i have to say my boss? hmmmmmmmmmmmmm

16) According to you, which other persons should take this questionnaire?
I dont think anybody would be doing this questionnaire. As most of my friends are adults not teenagers anymore to spend time in completing this questionnaire unlike me LOL

Postcards to Jeff :)

2011-05-30T21:42:00.004+08:00

My postcards to Jeff Wong :)

Today i posted out 4 postcards to Jeff :)

That's all to update lol

I miss you a lot hon . so so much.

Thanks for the txts this morning.

I love you xoxo

My Horoscope for today : Capricorn :

Friendship is supposed to be a two-way street. But lately your relationship with a special person seems to be a one-way avenue that culminates in a dead end. Do you know why? Or is this person's change of behavior a mystery? You are very perceptive and even intuitive, Capricorn - yet you can also be quite dense when it comes to reading the emotions and feelings of others. Use your insight and your creativity to dig deeper into the issue. You may find that that dead end is actually a pleasant route along a scenic path.

Q & A!

2011-05-30T20:57:00.002+08:00

Have you ever been attracted to someone older than you? If So, Who?:

Yes, Jeff Wong :) He is 2 years older than me. U can never tell that he is older than me, cos i look older :( (grrrrr)

What was the last thing you ate?:

Chicken Soup with Broccoli. Mum made it :) with some green salads! Eating healthy!! :D

Do you believe in love at first sight?:

Hmm Love at first sight not really. But attracted to someone at first sight. yes :). It takes more than that for me. I dont fall in love easily :)

Are you wearing socks right now?:

Yeah! Purple ones!

What color is the shirt you're wearing now?:

Purple!

Who was the last person you danced with?:

Danced? Hmmm Probably Siti and Suzie when we were at Phuket.

Do you dance in your kitchen?:

Yes when there's awesome music on :) and when i'm happy

When was the last time you ate a cupcake?:

Cupcakes! 2 weeks ago! Suzie bought some for me to cheer me up :) Awww bless her.

Who's birthday party did you last attend?:

Pari's :)

Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today:

Nope. Maybe i should later

Ever embarass yourself in front of a crush?:

Uhh yeah. I am only human! (rolls eyes)

Do you tan in the nude?:

I dont tan. so hah. My skin is already tanned naturally from the sun (Shrugs)

Wanna go splunking (cave diving)?:

Cave diving? wow no... sounds scary? lol

If you were president, what's the first law you would approve/change?:

Uhh lemme see... for all private sector workers to have a constant high percentage salary raised.

Do you think humans will ever live on other planets?:

No. LOL

This or That

Sub or Burger? : SUB! I actually prefer O'Brien's sandwiches.. YUMMMMAY

Dogs or Cats?:Cats! Well actually both. I love those cute little puppies! xx

With or without frosting?: Depends.

Wheel of Fortune or Price is Right? : W.O.F

Champagne or Wine?: Depending with the occasion and mood.

Liquor or Beer?: I'm a Liquor girl! But sometimes beer is good. I love Hoegaarden Beer.

Angelina Jolie or Jennifer Aniston?:ANGELINA JOLIE

Aerosmith or The Rolling Stones?:Aerosmith

Lays or Pringles?: Lays xx

Dunk'n Donuts or Krispy Kreme?:Krispy Kreme!!! I love their glazed donuts!

Older or younger Significant Other?: Doesn't matter im not that choosy. But at my current one is older than me, and im happy :)

Snapple or Propel?: hm? Im an idiot. Wha??

Google or Yahoo?:I used to love Yahoo! But now it's GOOGLE!!!! xxx

Superman or Batman?: Hmm both? kah kah. Maybe batman cos he's rich!

The One Favorite...

Sex Position: Oooo.. me on top? or something like that.. I love to be on top :D Doggy style i love 'em too lol but then again anything goes as long as i'm making love with the one that i love :) xx

Girl Name: Hmmm I dunno.. Veronica?

Boy Name: Tristan is good :)

Milkshake Flavor: Choc or Vanilla

Ice Cream Dessert: Raspberry or Vanilla

Song To Dance To: Right now it's LMFAO - Party Rock Anthem ft. Lauren Bennett, GoonRock

Cookie: Famous Amos! Choc Chip with NO nuts xx :)

Musician/Band: Hmmm... wow too many

Room In House: Mine! :)

Soup: Tomato! Or Jeff's Chicken Soup xx

Sport: Swimming/Badminton

Holiday: Any would be fine :D

Snack: Chips n dips!

Friend: All of them :) Specially my Paku Girls

What Do You Think Of When You Hear...

Vegetable:Green

Hip-Hop:GREAT MUSIC!

Funny: Annoying Orange LOL

Pig: YUCK!

Country: Italy

Sex: DELICIOUS!

Ring: diamonds

Scissors:Painful (dunno why this pops up first in my head

String: Cello, Aww i miss playing with my sexy cello (Andre) yeah that's his name.

Camel: Spits (hahaha?)

Blue:Ocean

Soda:Mountain Dew

Peace: Pigeon :)

My Staffs

2011-05-30T20:07:00.005+08:00

Today i'm gonna introduce you to my staffs :). Will update more in a while. Gonna have dinner first :)

Liya

Aidan (moving to PST)

Anne

Emmanuel

Annie

Ezatul

Sharon

KR (resigning)

Resh

Deen

Fadhil

Zul

Maniam (resigning lol)

Hilman

I Miss You Hon

2011-05-29T21:55:00.004+08:00

I miss you Sayangku Jeff Wong xxx

Today I m feeling so low as you are not with me,
I miss u every moment wherever I may be.

My mind sets no where and just thinks about you,
I wanna talk a lot with you but our talks are due.

My lips are trembling and calling your name,
I cannot see you in front of me and I m going through this pain.

My tears are in trauma should they flow out or lay inside,
they want to roll down my cheeks but could not decide.

My one hand holds the other as it cannot hold yours,
It wanders for only your warm touch , I m sure.

My heart beats gets faster wishing you might be here,
giving me the feel of joy, love and care.

How much I love you is all i know,
i just feel it and I dont want to show.

I miss you with every beat of my heart, no doubt
you are the only one of whom i can think about.....

I cried writing that :( I am missing him so much that i just can't possibly explain just how much.

My horoscope for today : Capricorn

You may have recently faced a conflict with someone you care about. This individual is stubborn - but you can be quite stubborn too, Capricorn. If you have resolved this problem but you still don't feel comfortable with the way you two relate to each other, you may need to take the first step in healing the rift. It may be hard for you to put yourself in a position where you feel vulnerable, but it could also be quite enlightening and empowering. Reach out to our loved one, and you will reap the rewards of your kindness.

Happy 35th month!!

2011-05-26T21:22:00.005+08:00

Happy Happy me with Jeff my love <3

Fuck so i havent been updating much for 2 days.

I've been swarmed with last minute meetings/trainings/workshops and also i needed to finish up a report which i've been delaying for weeks!!

So hectic :(

I dont have anything much to update tonight. Im pretty hammered! :(

Today, is also is my 35th month with Jeff.

I wish that he was here with me so that we'd be able to have our small celebration :)

I know this sounds impossible but i have never loved anyone as much as i love him ~

Hon,

I can't wait for October!! xoxoxoxo

Just gonna share my horoscope for today (LOL) .. then off to bed. Im freakishly tired :(

May 26th - Capricorn:

You may not have yet noticed the radical improvements you have been hoping for in a certain situation, but there are improvements - aren't there, Capricorn? You can't expect every single detail of that situation to miraculously improve in one instance, but you can and should recognize that things are getting better a little bit at a time. If you become angry or moody or cynical because you can't have everything you want at once, you won't benefit from the small changes that are taking place - and that would prevent further good energy from entering the picture. Be grateful for small improvements.

Frustrated!

2011-05-24T10:30:00.008+08:00

I am frustrated with these 2 girls that promised me that they'll help to bring 2 carton of ciggies for Jeff to NZ. Apparently now they went MIA.

The reason why im frustrated due to this - is if they can't help (as promised) they should advise me so that i'd tell Jeff not to drive an hour ++ to Auckland thinking that they have the things that he wanted.

I was so furious that i had a major headache and had to take aspirins - knocked out sleeping till 7 in the morning.

Apparently my friend in the UK; Jasvin has been sharing my blog entries with some of her mates. Not that i have problems/issues bout it (my blog is public after all) - but i dont appreciate this particular person - making fun of my entries. Grrrr!!..

I know it's funny and for jokes but seriously i think that it's mean.

It is my blog after all.

For those who doesnt know me may think that i'm a loser by what i have written here so far.

I am not a loser. I am just an emotional unstable person who likes the spotlight/attention once in a while. (Sounds more like crazy than loser right? lol. Oh fuck that)

It's my blog i have the right to write whatever that i want.

I dont really need people to like what i write.

I just need a place to express my feelings - by writing.

I'd post a youtube video if i want to be even more expressive. Come to think of it i havent been uploading any videos for weeks. Will do by this week :)

Oh! He did txt me yesterday :) - Exactly 3 days.

Happy Me ~

Today's Horoscope Capricorn :

Keep it light with a stressed-out friend or loved one, Capricorn. You may be thinking about approaching an important person in your world to talk about a weighty subject, but this individual won't be receptive right now. You may feel as though you've been hitting a lot of road blocks of this nature recently - and that's just the cosmic climate kicking up some mischief. For now let go of serious matters and try to focus on being more carefree in your relationships and with your work. There will be plenty of time to get serious later on.

Our Horoscope for today

2011-05-22T23:54:00.004+08:00

22/05/2011

Capricorn :

If someone wants to help you out with an endeavor you find overwhelming, just say yes. It's often hard for you to accept help, given your independent spirit. You like to have creative control of whatever you do, because you know that the final result will be dependent on how much of your heart and your soul you pour into it. But someone in your world has a sincere desire to help you out and will put in an excellent effort. Accepting someone's kind gesture will go far to ease your burden

Cancer :

Feeling overwhelmed, Moonchild? Recent challenges have left you with greater determination to maintain a positive attitude, to take everything in stride, to continue to persevere, and to believe in a fabulous outcome now matter what happens. But new hurdles you've faced recently may have left you feeling like there's a boulder resting on your shoulders. Even though things may be tough right now and even though you can't see much to hope for on the horizon - good fortune is awaiting the right moment to make an appearance. Hang in there!

YAY!! I LOVE YOU!!

2011-05-21T20:57:00.004+08:00

US :)

Today's entry gonna be short.

I'm at home -pretty exhausted. Been cleaning up my room and watched 3 movies so far in my room.

Just wanted to update that Jeff called me last night and we talked bout 1 Hour ++!!!

OH MY GOD!!! I WAS SOOO EXCITED!!

It was a bit awkward at the beginning - for me.

Cos i wasn't expecting the call.

Well, will probably update on the content of the conversation later.

Right now i'm gonna help my mum to cook dinner.

I LOVE YOUUUU JEFF!!! OCTOBERRR OCTOBERRRRR!!!! ~~~~

What?!?!

2011-05-20T11:07:00.033+08:00

Hello All! Happy Friday! What??? LOL. Dear god, please help me! I MISS HIM!!!!

Picture : taken this morning @9am@ Hani's house.

Me: Work starts at 9am

Hani: Work starts at 9am

CT: Supposed to be at the offce at 8:30am

Question: Why the heck are we still in Hani's house?

P.S: That was CT lying on top of me - yes both of us were still sleeping.

After a depression day at work yesterday, the day ended pretty well.

Thanks to the Hani, CT, Liya, Jasvin and Paul (lol).

Hani - because stayed over her house - eventhough i didn't sleep much but at least i am not alone in the house. Pretty relaxing. Love Love!

CT - For just being her. A stupid bitch! LOL. How can anyone just make me laugh and angry out of annoyance at the same time? Well, that's HER specialty. Love Love!

Liya - .... well, im not sure what to say bout you. Cos you were sleeping most of the time. So.. yeah thanks for that. LOL

Jasvin - for ALWAYS ALWAYS being there for me - eventhough you're thousand miles away in London! THANK GOD for the internet! specially GoogleTalk. I totally appreciate it Jas! Love Love!

Paul - for being an ASSHOLE! hahahahha OH god! You made me laugh so much lastnight! That conversation between you and CT - was HILLARIOUS! Thank you! :)

We had dinner at home. Ginger Chicken, Tofu, and rice. I didn't take much picture of the dinner lastnight, but only 1 of Liya chopping the garlic hehe

Liya~

This was the view @ Hani's place

I took a couple of medicines lastnight, wanted to go to the clinic/pharmacy to get sleeping pills too but wanted to see whether i could sleep that night for more than 3 hours before me going to get help.

I havent had enough sleep for weeks and it's pissing me off!

The result of my sleep lastnight? : 3 hours and 30 minutes? An improvement? Can 30 minutes be considered as an improvement? Shrugs.

Oh! Ohhh!!! Oooooh!!! I got a text lastnight from The Bodyshop there's a sale going on up to 70% starting from today till June 6th if im not mistaken! Yay! So im planning to get lots of lotions! And probably some shimmering mineral blushers!

What else to update... hmmm

Silly Paul

Oh yeah! Paul txt'd me yesterday afternoon asking if i called him and then he accidentally hung up. I replied "Maybe..."

In actual fact i didnt. But i like messing his head. Been friends with this fucker for 10 yrs! He's still the same asshole! hahahaha.

So we emailed each other for a while - he was bragging bout his new HTC phone. I bragged bout my depression.. what? what? lol.

He emailed me few websites that i can check out to find jobs and regards of Visa Application.

We emailed each other for a while and then i promised him that will let him talk with 1 of my friends. (CT)

Silly CT

They talked rubbish for hours and txting each other too, it was freaking hillarious!

Damn it i want to write in more detail but im actually updating this from my work place. People around me are being such busy body and annoying wanting to know what im up too (blushes. ok fine! aku curik tulang!! tak buat kerja sangat LOL)

Ok so about Jas! I have to type quickly - she's AWESOME! and GORGEOUS! and IM JEALOUS that she's in the UK now.

Jas, took this pic for me 5 mins after i asked for 1 lol <3

Dont ask me what is this. LOL But it surely looked so yummmmay!!

SHIT!!! I REALLY NEED TO PUBLISH THIS POST ENTRY!!!

ALL THE OTHER MANAGERS HAVE GONE FOR A MEETING AND I DECIDED NOT TO GO WITH THE EXCUSE "Im sorry im unable to attend - i have 2 important urgent cases to handle.

In actual fact i wanted to update my blog entry AND also i am too lazy to go for the meeting.

BUT THE DECISION BACK FIRED!

Dammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmn!!!!!

Now i am being ATTACKED! MORE agents coming to me asking me questions.

Dont you understand? I AM LAZY!!! GHAAAAAAAAAAAAA *runs*

OK so tata for now! (runs even faster)

Today's Horoscope: LOL

Capricorn: (Me)

As you know all too well, Capricorn, a perfectly beautiful apple with a brilliant red exterior and glossy skin can reveal an ugly worm once you bite into it. Having had this kind of experience once too often in life - metaphorically speaking - you are naturally apprehensive about something or someone new that has come into your life. This situation or person appears to have it all, and may even seem like the realization of a dream come true. Sometimes that shiny apple is good to the core, though - so don't be afraid to take a bite.

Cancer : (Jeff)
To truly get through to someone who is important in your life, Moonchild, you may have to bare your soul. Run-of-the-mill expressions of feelings just won't do. Ordinary displays of affection won't work either. This calls for more. You will have to reveal your deepest feelings. While you are known for having great sentimentality and being a very warm and nurturing person, it is - ironically - often difficult for you to be truly vulnerable. You are so sensitive that you fear getting hurt. But without that risk, you won't find the connection that you seek.

What's happening to me? :(

2011-05-19T12:35:00.002+08:00

Crying in the pantry

Dear Farah,

Why are you so unhappy? - Because i am missing someone a lot and i don't know what to do about it.

Why do you always cry? - Cos i am sad, that i couldn't do anything to make myself happy.

Why do you always sleep for 3-4 hours a day? - Cos, i'm unable to sleep - i keep on seeing his face.

What's wrong with your eyes? - I couldn't sleep and i cry too much at times due to missing the love.

Why are you quiet nowdays? - I don't feel like talking. If i open my mouth you're just gonna be annoyed with me. I couldn't be myself. I need to put on a fake smiley mask to satisfy others. Im tired of that.

Why don't you laugh at any jokes? - Cos, It's not funny.

Why do you always checking your phone? - I'm expecting something - that'd definitely make me smile....

Are you a weakling? - Maybe .... hate to admit it. But put my ego aside... Yes, maybe i am.

Are you an idiot? - No. I'm not a child. I need to evaluate everything.

Are you an annoying person? - Surely not (i hope so).

Why does your heart skips a bit and races when you hear the ring tone "I Do" by Colbie Caillat? - Because this song will come out if when he calls or txts me.

Dear Jeff, I am missing you loads and i love you with all my heart.

I am freaking confused - with everything now.

Please make me feel better :(

Thank you.

Tuesday - Horoscope

2011-05-17T19:24:00.003+08:00

Im gonna share on daily's horoscope - for both Cancer and Capricorn.

Jeff is a Cancer and I'm a Capricorn.

I am missing him so much - and unable to communicate with him, i'd just do almost anything to feel close to him.

I've bought a new video camera, i've been recording some things but havent had the time to upload them.

So anyways, this is our horoscope for today:

Capricorn : Me - the one missing Jeff a lot :(

If your house needs cleaning but you don't have much time before company arrives, you may do a quick freshening to make it feel inviting. But once you do, you may discover there are other things that need to be done. You might sweep the floors and find that they also need to be polished. You might clean the bathroom sink and discover that the tub needs to be scoured. The same goes for a relationship, Capricorn. There's trouble in a primary relationship, but there are many aspects to it. Take some time to delve into the issues and make necessary repairs. This is a potentially lifelong friendship or romance, so it will certainly be worth the effort.

:: Hmmmm yeah - i'd do almost anything :(

Cancer : Jeff Wong Kah Mun - my love

Power is a double-edged sword, Moonchild. When you have the power to direct someone's choices, you must also invoke the power to be empathic and understand that person's needs. When you have the power that comes with being loved and adored by someone, you must use your power to build that person up rather than to tear him/her down. Likewise, the power to change someone's life - whether your own or someone else's - can never be taken for granted or taken advantage of. You are in a very powerful phase now. You can control a situation. But you must respect not just the beneficial aspects of power - you must also remain aware of its downside.

Monday ~

2011-05-16T14:11:00.002+08:00

I am going out of my mind!

I am so sad~

I couldn’t control the tears coming out from my eyes.

I cried in the showers this morning

– sobbing uncontrollably -

My eyes hurt and swollen

My head is spinning

My heart aches

I feel so weak – lifeless ~

Dear god, please help me.

Make me stronger ~ =(

Nu York?

2011-05-15T09:05:00.002+08:00

Babi lah kau Ikmal! Mana pulak ada city kat USA tu NU YORK?

Im Not Stupid - Just Patience

2011-05-14T22:01:00.003+08:00

The Title of this blog and this picture - tells it all.

Im crying and crying and crying.

I just want everyone to know that - I may not know what's going on right now - or know what may happen in the future - But - i am NOT stupid ! Just have a lot of patience....

Just make sure the patience wont dry out ~

Ok going to continue wet the pillows... xx

My New Video Camera!

2011-05-14T15:42:00.001+08:00

Got myself a new Sony Handycam (DCR-SX85E)! Now i can make better quality videos for Jeff! :) Oh god, this is too much right?

But honestly the main reason is because i want to make videos for Jeff....

God i am missing him tremendously... :(

Will continue more later - hati rasa nak berkecai - sedih :(

Phuket Pictures! :) - the rest you may check in my FB :)

2011-05-14T14:37:00.015+08:00

In our Room i have picture of Jeff and I brought from home :)

The TV in the room - and Soft Drinks/Mineral Water/Beer (refilled FOC 3 nights)

Jas and Indy's Room

The View from our room (balcony)

The bathroom

Me in the bathroom

Pari sitting outside the balcony where i will sit to smoke :)

Baan Laimai Resort Hotel ; Patong Beach, Phuket

Banana Club - awesome!

Us in White Room Club

CT and Suzie in Banana Club

Suzie, Jas, Indy, Me and Pari before heading for the Phi Phi tour

Jas and Indy @ Maya Bay

Us @ Maya Bay where the movie "The Beach" was filmed

Us @ Maya Bay

Swallow Cave

Monkey Island

Monkey Island - look! there's a baby monkey!

Me - Snorkeling!

The Lunch @ Phi Phi

So gorgeous! Jasvin And Indy @Khai Island

Jas - Suzie - Idzuan @Khai Island

Suzie and Idzuan - Pari laughing at them LOL @Khai Island

Jasvin and hubby@Khai Island

Indy and Pari @ Khai Island

The beach @ Khai Island

Suzie - Me - CT - Pari in the pool @ Baan Laimai Hotel

the Van VW-cum-Bar!

Idzuan + Indy @Breakfast

Us@ Patong Beach

@ Baan Laimai's bar

My fav food @ Phuket. Choc Banana Crepes! xx

Me + CT by the pool

Me and Pari by the pool

Javin and me By the Pool

My Shrimp fried rice with pineapple

CT with her chicken Satay

Nyammmm

The Postcards for Jeff

Jas + Indy

Me in the room

The Postcards for Jeff xxx

CT with one of the Thai Guys lol

My stuffs!

Pari + CT

CT's tattoo

My temp tattoo

Phuket!

2011-05-12T12:14:00.001+08:00

Sooooo!!! Yeah i've been delaying posting a new blog entry! :D

I went to Phuket for 4 days with my awesome friends Jasvin and husband, Suzie and husband, Pari, and Siti.

It would be even awesome if Hani + Mei Kuan and my love Jeff were there as well.

Mochie drove me to the airport and we arrived Phuket about 1pm thai time if im not mistaken hmmmm.. Ok seriously i was too tired to notice. Didnt get enough sleep the day before.

Thai is 1 hour later than Malaysia, the weather was beautiful. It rained twice while we were were in 4 days but most of the time it was sunny. Like REALLY SUNNY!! :D

1st day at Phuket -

After collecting our luggages : We went to the counters in the Phuket Airport to find a taxi or a van to drive us to the hotel and to check out the cheapest package to phi phi island.

We found a place which they offered reasonably eventhough we tried to bargain for a much lower price. But i think it was OK : 1300 Thai Bhatt each person for the phi phi package and also including with our ride from the airport to our hotel.

We stayed at Baan Laimai Resort near Patong Beach Phuket. It was such a LOVELY PLACE! It was quite a bargain too. Jasvin went to Agoda.com to book the rooms - they were having discount promotions on the dates we were booking. So lucky us!

Me, CT, Pari stayed in 1 room we asked for additional bed, and Jas + Husband stayed beside our room both rooms ont he 5th floor. As for Suzie + Idzuan they stayed at the connecting pool room @ 1st floor.

Will upload the pictures of the rooms later tonight or maybe tomorrow :)

We activated our lines with Thai's prepaid True Tone. The Sim Card is free all we need to activate it is to top up minimum of 100 thai Bhatt. and i also activated my Blackberry Service amount of 60 thai bhatt for 3 days. Unlimited internet usage and bb services!! CHEAP AS HELL!!!

The first night we were there, we decided to explore Bangla Road - it was somehow like Pattaya. There were agogo shows - strippers doing their thang and all those weird shows where they insert bananas in their privates and popped it out with their inner muscles (you know what i mean) LOL. There were no entrance fee BUT you would need to purchase a drink minimum each person. And the price... WAS RIDICULOUS! 800 Bhat for a cheap beer? Yes that was the cheapest drink! LOL

We decided to get out from the place - since it was not much fun anyways... PLUS im not gonna pay that much for a drink that i wont be drinking?! Doesnt make sense to me.

We walked out the street again and we bumped into this adorable chick gave out flyers on "White Room Club" they had a promotion for happy hours, free bottle of vodka all you need to pay is for the mixers.

So we went there to check it out. It wasn't that grand but they played good music. I was impressed.

I only had a drink of vodka mixed with redbull (super sweet plus i didnt plan to get drunk at all - taking care of my livers! LOL).

My friends CT (short for Siti) and Suzie they went bonkers after a glass! or maybe a glass and a half! What?! But it was all cool, i guess as both of them wanted to have fun and to release their stress. It was funny looking at them. Pari joined in the fun a while after.

Jas and husband (Indy) and Suzie's husband (Idzuan) enjoyed the performance from the girls. Laughing all the way~

I had my fun by taking lots of pictures! (as usual)

We were at White Room until about 1 am, and decided to walk back to our hotel rooms. Walking back we'd pass some few other bars, clubs, restaurants.

Suzie and CT decided to check out another club "Banana" Yeah, seriously it's called banana! Hahahaha. They were racing to the stairs and went to the entrance. Me the sober one among those 2 had to follow them to make sure they'd be alright.

The entrance was 200 thai bhatt, free 1 drink (ANY DRINKS!) I went for Long Island. (yeah so i drank another glass, now i remember. damn! so i drank in total of 2 glasses of alcohol while i was @ Phuket).

Banana Club was really awesome. I loved the music they played, i loved the place, i loved how bubbles will come out every 5 seconds. I wasn't bored at all being a chaperone for those 2 girls. We danced at the podium for about 2 hours!

We stopped by a stall in front of our hotel, selling crepes. Idzuan ordered 2 crepes and we ate it while heading back to our rooms.

I didn't sleep much that night... was missing jeff tremendously :( cried till i slept.. for only 2 hours..

2nd day at Phuket -

We woke up pretty early went for breakfast and waited for the bus to take us for the island tour - 1 day trip - we stopped at Maya Bay on Phi Phi Ley (such an amazing beach! will upload pics later!) ,was chosen by the makers of the Movie, "The Beach" and it starred the well known heart throb, Leonardo Di Caprio and this rocketed the island to fame. But this speedboat tour is about so much more than Maya Bay. The speedboat tour takes you on a whirl wind trip to explore the cliffs, beaches bays, and the snorkeling sights of Phi Phi Ley, that seem a million miles away from Phuket and yet so accessible.

Then we stopped to see the cave that swallows usually will build their nest - which some people will drink as medicines...

Then we stopped for a 30 minutes of Snorkeling at local coral reef. Personally it was nothing to shout about, I've seen much beautiful corals in Malaysia. It was boring~ but i enjoyed swimming and snorkeling anyways. Both Suzie and CT didnt snorkel they stayed on the boat. Pari and Jas went into the sea but probably less than 10 minutes lol. It's alright. The boys were having fun swimming. So i alone went swimming around the boat - wishing Jeff was there too at least i could follow behind his back - he'll find interesting things to explore...

Next we stopped at Wild monkeys at Monkey Beach Phi Phi fed the monkeys and had lunch at Phi Phi Island. I bought 2 postcards for Jeff there :)

Final Stop was at Koh Khai Island. Beautiful Beach i bought a beach dress there :D

We arrived back at Phuket about 4pm - we swam at the pool for a while before taking a shower and went for dinner.

After dinner we went to take a tuk tuk ride to Phuket's Hard Rock Cafe - as CT and Pari wanted to buy some Hard Rock Cafe's shirts. After that we saw a VW Mini Van-cum-bar. It was awesome! Will share the pictures later. Indy ordered a bucket of uhmm i forgot what drink.. I didnt drink though due to i wasnt feeling well. Stupid Flu.

After that they decided to check out some clubs but i dont remember whether they did because they came back bout 30 minutes after. I spent the night in the room after dinner and wrong the 2 postcards to be delivered to Jeff :)

3rd day at Phuket -

Woke up - had breakfast and we went to find for a good spa - decided to have a body scrub + aroma therapy massage + menicure + padicure. Found a place offered us a good price of 800 Thai Bhatt for all of that. We made an appointment for 5pm that evening and continued exploring Patong beach area.

Suzie + Idzuan were going back that afternoon at 4pm so they went walking together to buy some souvenirs for family. Indy and Pari signed up for a thai cooking class. They learnt to cook 2 thai dishes 1) Green Curry Chicken and 2) Tom Kha Goong. They really enjoyed the cooking class :). CT and I went exploring the streets - found a post office for me to send out the 2 postcards and i bought another 4 postcards to send to Jeff with the stamps as well. Each Postcard cost about 10-15 thai bhatt and the stamps for each postcard is 15thai bhatt :)

We went for the spa that evening (Me, CT, Pari) and Jas + Indy went for the foot massage (not sure how much it was hmmm)

THE MASSAGE WAS HORRIBLE! I mean im not pain tolerant. But i seriously didn't feel anything when they massaged me!!! Even when they circled around my breasts i looked at my naked skin - IM NOT FEELING ANYTHING!!!!.

The menicure + padicure was fugly too. shrugs.... This is what you get for 800 Thai Bhatt. I laughed at myself ....

Then we went to the rooms and went for dinner again. After dinner we tried to find this mall where recommended by locals that they sell quite cheap stuffs and the place closes quite late - we walked SO FAR and when we arrived only 3 shops were opened the rest were closed! And also it wasn't any where cheaper than the shops near our hotel! What a waste of energy!!!! But i had fun exercising walking though. So it's all good :)

Walked back to the room and CT wanted to go check out the agogo club since it was the last night for us @ Phuket. I didn't wanna go i was kinda tired and i wanted to write the 4 postcards for Jeff. Jasvin didn't go either. So Pari + CT + Indy went to check the agogo club out. Jasvin knocked out on the bed right after looking through the pictures i took from my camera. I was busy writing the postcards for Jeff and took a shower right after. It was raining heavily once i got out from the bathroom - so i sat outside the balcony and smoked looking out - until the girls came back around 3:15am.

They enjoyed the show... Good! LOL.

4th day at Phuket -

Woke up had breakfast. Walked around to do some shopping - posted my 4 postcards to Jeff :) - packed out stuffs checked out. Kept our luggages at the hotel since our flight was around 9:45pm and we did some more shopping.

We wanted to eat the Sticky Rice Manggo which was quite famous at Bangkok but couldnt find it at Phuket, It was hard to communicate with the locals, as every time we asked "where to buy/get sticky rice mango? mango eat with rice? mango rice?" they either just understand manggo (fruit) or rice. They directed us to all the wrong places!

We decided to have lunch at this mall and got the sticky rice there. Me , CT and Indy ate McDonalds. LOL

We walked back to the hotel around 4 pm and it rained heavily for a while for an hour we waited for our tuk tuk to send us to the airport only to be slapped by the face with the information that our flight would be delayed @ 11:20pm - will arrive KL around 1:40am .. WHAT?!!!!!!

We killed our time in the boring small airport by talking rubbish and staring at each other.

I lost my wallet that day :|

i dont wanna talk much about it. I get pissed off just thinking bout it.

That's all for today. Will update more tonight with pictures :D

In conclusion : I HAD TOO MUCH THAI FOOD THAT I CANT LOOK AT ANY TOM YUMS OR TOM KHAS for months! and i had SO much fun with my friends. it'd be more awesome if Hani and MK were there and obviously Jeff Wong too <3.. and i told myself to be stronger - not to cry too much due to missing Jeff. Just to pray that he's doing alright and well over new zealand. it's hard. but im learning :) and i am a strong woman... i love you a lot jeff :)

xoxo

May 2nd Video Blog to Jeff xoxo

2011-05-09T12:49:00.002+08:00

Part 1

Part 2

Video Blogging

2011-05-01T22:55:00.003+08:00

Im thinking of making a video blog on a daily basis dedicated to Jeff until he comes back, and then to upload them in my YouTube account and also paste the URL link in my blog :)

It would somehow be like a love letter - but in a video mode? LOL.

Oh god! I miss him tremendously!

Maybe i could burn it in a DVD and pass it to my friend to pass it to him when they're going to Auckland this month 25th...

and to snail mail the rest to him 26th May onwards :)

Like you know 1 month i'll compile it all and send it to him :)

Oh fuck! I am such a romantic :">

Hang on will wait till it finishes upload in YouTube and i will paste it here and only then i will publish this blog post =D

I LOVE YOU JEFF!!! xoxo

That moment when you're with the one you love, that special someone, and time just flies

2011-05-01T13:22:00.004+08:00

You're free to do whatever you want to do, but you're not free with the consequences of what you do.

Favourite Quote of the day.

Today i'm going to write of the horrible days i've gone through for the past 2 days...

IT WAS TERRIBLE!!!

I was crying all day long on and off - i look at people around me - i feel so blurry like i do not belong there. I went back home i felt even more depressed. Locked myself in my room. Crying till my pillows were terribly wet. Sobbing so loud like a sad widow.

I tried to sleep but i couldn't. I wanted to take the sleeping pills but scared that i might take be dependable on them.

So i chose to spend 2 days at my friend's place. People were sleeping beside me but my eyes were teary and sobbing under the blanket.

Lastnight was the WORSE!!

Why?

Because the love of my life has yet to contact me.

Again with the drama~

With all the pictures that are being uploaded by his friends (girls) of him drinking and hanging around with girls doesn't make me feel any better...

Where's the trust that i had before? I asked myself..

Where has it gone?

An idiot girl full of insecurity due to the fact that they're having different religion and unable to contact her love and looking at pictures pasted all over his Facebook profile as if mocking me - making fun of me - laughing at me.... just felt like... that was it...

She broke down and cried her heart out - even though she doesn't want to talk about it much with her friends and prefer to write it here.... but at last she lost the battle.

I talked about it with 2 of my friends.

They were shocked with how badly depressed i was. They know that i was sad - really really sad. But up to having a bad breakdown? They had no idea. They freaked out.

They were both giving me advices (all positive ones) but still i was sobbing - i'm having a huge war inside my head. 1 part of me telling me all the positive ones and the other 1 part the negative.

When i thought i'd be able to sleep after sweating due to the wars inside of me - my eyes would pop out so big again! As the negative side was winning the battle...

It was such a tiring sleepless nights.

So when my friends were sleeping - i needed fresh air. I walked out of her apartment around 4:30am alone brought my box of cigarettes along and headed to the pool.

I cried so loudly there and smoked at the same time. I thought i was going crazy.

I just wanted to know whether the relationship was OK or not. Previously i was worried whether Jeff was doing alright or not - but after the pictures - i knew he was OK. Then why am i still crying?

I was scared - of loosing him. I do not want to loose him.

I was having so many thoughts running inside my head. Where did it go wrong? What did i do wrong?

At one point i decided to go to New Zealand to see him. But, I don't want to embarrass myself there :(.

So i decided to just text him, which surprisingly was delivered. I sent quite a long txt.

About 7am i went up to the apartment again, and sneaked inside the room, and continued crying.

1 of my friend woke up cos of the sound of my sobbing - i apologized.

Both of them were up by now and again they sat in front of me comforting me and helped me to think clearly about everything. Yet the negative one inside my head is boxing it all away.

We decided to have breakfast after that and i wanted to go back home right after.

And i received a text.

It was from him.

I was happy!!!

And here i am at home wanted to upload it here that right now i am the happiest for the past 5 days....

I hope this feeling will last until he comes back...

I love you..

I miss you Jeff Wong Kah Mun

2011-04-28T22:58:00.003+08:00

I miss you so much. I know that probably you are mad at me for being all jealousy and nonsense. Yes i always over react over little things, and that is me..

Maybe i did a mistake by forwarding you an email and lashed at you bout some things through emails out of jealousy.

But please do know that most importantly I miss you So so So so SO Very Much and I love you with all my Heart.

Take care sayang xoxo

Im such a drama queen?

2011-04-28T22:31:00.003+08:00

Yes i am!

Starting to get worried cos Jeff did tell me before that one of her sister loves to read books (like me) and she's bit cuckoo... aka banyak berangan...

Am i such a drama queen because of this? Or i just like the attention?

I do get enough attention from my family..

Hmmmmm... Ok after in a depression mode for days. I made a conclusion to stop over thinking and just wait patiently for Jeff to come back into my arms.

Jealousy and Envy are deadly to the mind....

I believe that a problem isn't an excuse to back-out, but a inspiration to move forward. So i'm shouting at myself to STAY STRONG!

I just want to share that i am only hurting cos someone that i'm attached too that i love is being distant to me. I cant seem to reach his phone. Yes he told me million times that the reception there is horrible.. but i've also emailed him and messaged him @ Facebook.

Hmmm look at me! I am over thinking again! Probably he doesnt have time to go on line...

U know that Giving Love is the highest pleasure, receiving it back is the highest treasure.

I do treasure the love i have with him..

Im not sure at all he'll be reading my blog. But if he does i would like to tell you this Sayang ... " Love and life require taking a risk! Take it, and you'll realize it's not a risk at all but opportunity for your greatness"

I love you Jeff xx

---

2011-04-26T22:43:00.002+08:00

I guess i am overreacting -

If i was given the trust why must I not give the same trust?

It's time to grow up.

I miss you tremendously.

Happy 34th Month

2011-04-26T00:12:00.005+08:00

Happy 34th month to me + Jeff (if naybody else is counting besides me)

Last Friday night Jeff called me, after Ken told him that we communicated through FB messages.

He told me that nothing is wrong....and not to listen to Ken cos we do eventually always have the conversation together bout confused dont know what to do with our relationship - marriage? - like this forever? - I believed him...

Of course i do cos i love him so much with all my heart yeah? Eventhough when i know some of you are looking at me with the look "Yeah right you are in denial girl" I do believe him ...

Yes, i enjoyed the almost 1 hour conversation and he talked to me bout how depressed he is right now over there. I wish that i could reach out and give him a hug. The sad feeling i felt at that point of time was excruciating.

We ended the call on a good note and i was hoping to talk to him again during the weekend. But it didn't go as planned... It's alright cos i was busy with my family too. But i had a much better weekend after talking to him.

Today, I dont know why i started to have the insecure feeling again. Why? I am not sure.

He has never cheated on me before to make me feel this insecure.. Which i am so lucky ..

Is it because i cheated on him before? Im not sure if that can be categorise as cheating when i thought that the relationship was over but yeah maybe :(

but that was years ago.. so why am i feeling this insecure?

Is it because of our different religion? It has never bothered me before...

Is it because i am starting to grow up and wanting more from this relationship? Eg A marriage?

Yes. I think this is it.

I am no longer afraid of commitment.

I am ready.

But is he?

To him that both of us are in the same situation where by either he needs to convert to Muslim and losing his family, or me and him to get married oversea and loose my family.

But the problem is that i am just not loosing my family but i refuse to get married oversea with both of us different religion.

I come to realise that maybe this was why i never wanted to listen to him whenever he wanted to talk bout this, cos i do love him with all my heart and i do want to spend my life with him and he knows that i can't get marry with him oversea just like that....

So what am i doing?

I can't possibly let him go - just yet.. unless if he has found my replacement :(

I am feeling so low and insecure until i can't sleep at night thinking that - who am i to compare with a chinese girl? Wouldn't it be more simple for him? He doesn't have to think bout converting and to sacrifice much with a Chinese girl...

I do love you with all my heart. I am not sure what i am typing right now.

Yes as you keep on telling me - i always over-think about little things... But i can't help it.

I am sorry that i am such a mess.

I just wanted to be happy and grow old with you.

Please understand my pain...

Happy 34th month.

What am I going to do?

2011-04-22T10:43:00.002+08:00

People say that "God has a plan for our life. Be faithful, patient and obedient. Things will smooth themselves out."I honestly hope that in my case. It will.

Let me just update from the time i uploaded the blog until right now....

His friend contacted me again and i shoot out the question that has been in my mind right after the earlier blog entry

Whether a 3rd party was involved? The answer was NO. A relief (but not that much)

So the reason is still the same issue - RELIGION. ( I knew it)

I believe that if i want to know something, i need to ask him. Dont assume. That's how drama starts

BUT! I can't make myself to contact him.

I seriously can't.

Right now i am feeling numb - like super numb. My heart is broken into many pieces. Im crashing down.. but.. i'm unable to cry as much as i want too

I'm allowed to cry but my body refuses to let me do so...

So im feeling like a walking zombie, i didnt sleep at all, still coming to work, still doing work ... my body is here but my mind... my soul...

I know that eventually the same issue will arise again "RELIGION"

But i didn't expect him to tell someone he just knew than telling me about it. But i guess i can't blame him 100% as whenever he tried to talk bout iti will decide to block it out and don't want to talk bout it.

So the issue here - how am i going to go through my minutes - hours - days - weeks - months before he will talk to me about it. Knowing him - he'll rarely talk bout this on the phone - either txting or f-2-f.

And the option of texting should be ruled out - since i dont think his texts are working. My messages are still not delivered.

And i cant make myself to call him yet.. i just can't. Since he doesnt know that his new friend told me bout this issue. i cant possibly do it . Not just yet..

So what am i going to do? What am i going to do?

I am missing him tremendously and yes i do love him - but what am i going to do? :(

Crying~

2011-04-22T00:44:00.006+08:00

Ive been crying badly for good 15 minutes and while updating my blog tears are still running down freely from my eyes.

What happened? As i've updated my Bf is @ New Zealand and he's gonna be there for 7 bloody months.. and naturally after 1 month i start to miss him a lot! Like so much! and still i only cried twice both on a Saturday morning after waking up....

In the first - two weeks he was there he'll txt me occasionally as promised but came the 3rd week.. i got nothing..

I kept on texting cos i was worried didnt know how he was doing and kept on calling him, but to my dissapointment i still didnt receive any reply for about a week.

Then on April 10th i got through his phone and he sounded very angry as according to him he was sending a friend to the hospital.... and didnt get enough sleep because of this.... The call was short... my day was horrible...

And the week was horrible too.... still no replies for my texts and no answer for my calls....

I decided that probably he has found a replacement - there are a lot of people there anyways and most importantly CHINESE girls. Which has always been an issue to him since i am a MALAY and not just ANY MALAY I am a MUSLIM MALAY.

April 17th he called me which i dully called him back using the IDD card that i bought 3 weeks ago and we did talk for more than an hour. I was happy - and the week after that went well... until today...April 22 Friday ..... im bursting in tears...

Here i am a girl with mood swing and hard working girl, very much in love with someone for some time and finally we're together and coming to our 3rd year... made me cry again ...

I texted him a couple of times for 2 days but it was undelivered, which im not sure why - and i tried calling him n it went through but of course no answer - probably working... and his friend contacted me......

........................................

Yes i've always known that he'll be always confused.... i didnt ask for anything but just a serious relationship. Never i thought about Marriage as i know it's impossible even how BADLY i want it at times to happen. But im honestly just happy knowing that i have him in my life.....

But having these messages given to me... eventhough I asked for it .. i demanded his friend to tell me - but in a way his friend who wanted to tell me bout it.. just made me cry like a baby..

I felt like VOMITING as it just came rushed into me the realisation that - "Hey! I am replaceable..."

I just cant think right now. But i wanted to write it here so that i feel better and so that i'll stop crying and go to sleep. I refuse to go to work and face the war at the office with puffy eyes...

I AM SO HURT AND SO SAD and FEEL SO BETRAYED.

Why? Cos this was not shared with me! This was shared with someone else!!

Question : If u knew that by the end of the day it'll end to this confusion - WHY did you ask me to come back to you after that stupid bloody shits i did before - only to make me cry as bad now?

I have so many shits inside my head now that NOBODY knows! NOBODY knows what's going inside my head.

EVERYBODY thinks " Ohhhh it's Farah/Bella... She's alright. I bet she doesnt have problems.. she has SO many friends... Her family is rich ... She's crazy!"

I hate it when people think just because my parents are rich then so am i!

Just because i ALWAYS like to talk dirty and bout sex doesnt mean that i love having meaningless sex!!!

EVERYTHING IS SO COMPLICATED!!!!! =( =( =(

Im not sure what im going to do bout this now. What i know is that i will still wait for him as how i promised myself. I know i wont be doing anything dirty/sickening/bad here eventhough my BF is thousands miles away.

I think that the lying has to stop..

I can't handle any depressions at the moment.

We'll see by October when he comes back whether he'll come back to me as my BF still or as someone else..

I am SO heartbroken.......... =( =(

Picture of the day!

2011-03-14T23:04:00.002+08:00

Shoo Shweet. Me love you xx

Yeah that would be the description of today's picture of the day =).

This picture was taken on Jasvin's wedding reception.

Leaving On a Jet Plane

2011-03-13T12:58:00.003+08:00

Jeff Wong and Me

Jeff's flight @ 5:30pm today - he just called me and informed that he just finished checking in at KLIA and his luggage was overload 25KG hahaha. Poor baby.

He's going to be @ NZ for 7 months. I am going to miss him a lot. I tried holding my tears many times, but i crumbled anyways :p but i composed right after. I want to be strong. He's just going there to work, he will be back. So i need to be strong.

Im not sure on how am i going to be without having him around for 7 months, i am blessed for having such a loving family and amazing friends in my life. They promised me that they will make sure i wont be sad until he comes back...

I have nothing much to update - im actually really sad at the moment...

Sayang, please take good care of yourself - don't get sick.

I love you.

Picture of the day!

2011-03-10T21:21:00.002+08:00

OH MY GOD!!!!!!!! THIS PICTURE IS MAKING ME HUNGRY!!!

Potato Skin @ Tony Roma's!. Me LOVE!!! - Yep , this would be the picture of the day - EVENTHOUGH it has been taken like MONTHS ago! LOL.

I was just going through pictures from my lappy and WOW! I'm drooling already~ im definitely really hungry now.

Time to eat!!! I wonder what mummy's cooking?!

xxx

Lie To Me*

2011-03-10T21:03:00.002+08:00

Brendan Hines - Oooo isn't he HOT?!

1 of my new favourite TV Show xx

Based on the real-life scientific discoveries of Paul Ekmen, the series follows Lightman and his team of deception experts as they assist law enforcement and government agencies to expose the truth behind the lies.

I really enjoy watching the show - specially during the nights where Jeff is out station and i have no where to go - i'd just play and watch 2-3 episodes before i go to bed (during weekdays LOL) GOD ! No wonder im almost tired everyday at work :p

But it is such a great way to release some stress at home =)

Yeah - today im just gonna share with you just how much I LOVE THIS SHOW!

I wish i am as good as Cal Lightman and his team in detecting liars =)

PIMPLES!

2011-03-09T23:07:00.003+08:00

Today i am going to blab bout my pimples.

Normally you will find teenagers stressing bout them hitting puberty with pimples on their faces. Some with few non-visible spots and some with humongous ones.

For me - it was never a problem, i didn't have a sensitive skin - and it was smooth.

BUT!!! 3 months ago, i noticed that few annoying pimples started to grow around the chin area, i didn't think much bout it thinking that yeah maybe only now at the age of 29 im having few acne problem, so i started to take an extra care of my skin - which gone WORSE!

Now i have few visible pimples (little spots) on my face. LIKE WTF? I literally cried my eyes out few nights back looking at my face in the mirror - i couldn't recognise it. I looked so dull.

Im making my own assumption that pimples are in my life now is because im stressing out at work and i smoked a lot nowdays due to stress AT WORK and im not drinking plain water much.

Whatever the reasons are - im really not happy with my skin now :(

I dont want to elaborate more on this topic.

I cannot believe that only now - at my age i am stressing bout pimples - Oh fuck me!

Bye!

Picture of the day!

2011-03-07T18:50:00.003+08:00

LOL!!! KC - Stripping off to his undies (literally) @ the beach.

We went to PD joined the PST Gathering for 1 night there, and played this game whereby you will need to make a line of all the things that you have on you and whoever with the longest line will be the winner!

My team won, since we brought along a lot of things with us coincidently.

The almost naked guy was not in my team, but if you can see across there's Liya, Hafis and Bubu - yeap that was my team.

GOD DAMN HILLARIOUS! LOL.

Well, this is the picture of the day! WELL DESERVED! Hahahahha

My Birthday Gift Jan 2011

2011-03-07T18:31:00.004+08:00

I promised that i'd share the pictures so here it is!! :D

MY DELICIOUS BDAY CAKE! XOXO

MY PRESENT FROM JEFF XXX

PRESSIE FROM BUBU X

PRESSIE FROM LIYA X

PRESSIE FROM VEENA X

PRESSIE FROM FIFI X

PRESSIE FROM DARIAN LOL X

PRESSIE FROM QUYAH X

PRESSIE FROM HANI XX

PRESSIE FROM KK X

PRESSIE FROM MATT X

FOOD FROM RJ + SOFEA X

PRESSIE FROM SHALU X

2011!

2011-03-07T00:47:00.004+08:00

WOW! I haven't been writing for SO long!!!

it's 2011 March 7th 12:47 am right now, i just got back from dinner with Jeff xx

Ok so let me just update briefly of what happened in my life from the last update i wrote until today.

1) Siti Maimunah - now we're friends again. LOL not to say that we haven't been friends before but we basically lost contact for a while - well almost 2 years actually due to some silly decision that she made previously. But we've put that aside and reconcile just before Christmas. It was really amazing that all of us clicked again as if we were never apart all this while. A great friend indeed and im glad that we didn't lose her for good.

2) Suzie - gave birth to a baby boy on January 4th 2011. Ian Danish Hashim. He's such a gorgeous little baby. I love him to bits! Finally one of us has a baby! He's loved by all of us!! xx and she moved to a new place! Awesome!

3) Pari - finally is single again, ended her nonsense relationship that wasted her 3 1/2 years of time! All the effort and the sacrifices she made - was not appreciated. She's really sad but holding up. You deserve better darling and it's his loss xxx

4) Jasvin - had her 1 year anniversary on Jan 2011 flew back to Kenya to meet her in laws and finally had her wedding bangles off! She just enrolled for ACCA : good luck with that babe! LOL and she's coming back to Malaysia on APRIL! OMG!!! I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU!!! Bring back wicked stuffs from London for me!!! I really want that bell thingy! that says "Ring for sex" yes! That one!!! LOL

5) Mei Kuan - finally left that bastard she was with for so long and now is happier and i love you for making the right decision FINALLY! LOL. She's doing well @ AMEX but i havent seen her for some time. I am to be blamed partly but she's always busy when we plan to meet up and vice versa! xxx

6) HANI! - momoru! She moved to a new place and adopted 3 cats (Oyen,Tompok, Kampung LOL) probably getting married anytime soon (yes i said probably so yeah its all up to her whether she wants too or not LOL) she has been working very hard but not too happy with the place that she's working at the moment (we're working at the same place so yeah im not that too happy too shrugs). She has always been motivating me when im depressed at work. You are the best!!

7) Jeff - my love is going to be working @ New Zealand for 7 months and will be flying off next Sunday. I'm gonna be missing him LOADS! Yes i'll definitely cry a lot hahahha. But hey, im a big girl. I should be happy for him, he's doing this for himself. I can't be selfish right? and im not a selfish person =). I hope he'll miss me as much as im going to be missing him when he's there and will be able to skype/chat/talk/text a lot too!! xxxxx Love you baby!

8) Family - our maid went back to her country and now we're maid-less, the house is a MESS! hahaha Ok my parents and sister do some chores around the house so it's not that bad but it could be better if i helped too :p. The only thing i do is to clean up my own room and to do my own laundries. Yeah that's all. LOL. Oh god! I AM selfish. pouts... Or maybe im just lazy? Yeah ok im lazy! New resolution from today onwards - to help my parents a bit around the house :p.. Sister is waiting for her SPM's result and she has her driving license exam on Wednesday!!! I love my family xxxxx

9) Work - SUCKS! NUFF SAID!!! Just got my 2010 rating. It's 2A, so yeah there's an increment in salary but not as much as i wanted it and for my cash performance bonus... wish it was MORE! So much things to settle!!! What am i going to do? I have to make work fun! But im just always tired :(

10) My staffs - OH GOD! Some days i love them, some days i wish i could just strangle them to death! Im assuming it's all my fault. GHA! I dont want to think bout it at the moment. 10 staffs with their own different personalities...

11) ME! - I've gained more weight. Hmmm I'm telling myself to cut off the rice and to start exercise religiously every morning before i go to work, maybe 20 mins min on the treadmill and probably another 20 mins after work for start and after that to start playing badminton again and of course swimming xxx. I'm 29 this year! Oh yeah my birthday was on Jan 5TH and i forgot to update that my friends, love and staffs threw a surprise birthday party for me @ TGIF Gardens. WOW!! It was fabolous and i cried cos i was literally surprised!!! I got a lot of birthday gifts! Which i will upload here maybe later today or tomorrow :p yes i want to show off!! :D :D.

Anyways back to me and exercising - Im 29 already and i dont wanna die young cos im stressed almost everyday and crying inside cos of depressed at work most of the time - i need to channel the depression elsewhere besides eating. I eat a lot when im depressed - i keep on getting hungry - it's like im feeding my depression LOL. So i guess exercising should be good to distract me from eating a lot. Hmm. Let's try this for a month.

Im planning to join some slimming program. London weight management or some shit. With their wrapping and etc LOL. I need to do this for myself. This is for ME! I dont want to dissapoint myself anymore. It's not that i do not have any confidence now - heck i have such high confidence but yeah it sucks that people keep on coming to be and asking why i've gained so much. Come on, it's obvious i'm fatter now cos i ate too much and didn't do any exercise! Assholes!! Oh well.. LOL. Grrrrrr...

It's 1:18am now, time for bed. Working tomorrow... not happy :(

Gnite~~!! xxx

YAY! I'm gonna get it SOON!

2010-12-04T18:55:00.005+08:00

YAY!! I've ordered the 3 books of Paige Toon that i've been hunting for almost a month via amazon.ca

Why canadian's amazon? Because i opt for the books to be sent to Jeff's brother. So i don't need to pay for the international shipping BS. He'll be coming back this 21st. I received a notification email from amazon.ca stating that the order has been shipped yesterday! OMG!!!!! OMG OMG OMG! IM SUPER EXCITED!

The 3 books i bought cost including with the taxes are CDN$ 36.87!!! Can't wait to get my hands on them!!! (dreams)

OMG OMG OMG MY first ever!

2010-12-04T18:48:00.002+08:00

So yeah, i've uploaded my first ever you tube video blog LOL.

feels freaking weird man! My hair is not cooperating with me today - so... i wore a wig. YES a bloody wig LOL.

ok im excited!!!!

Oh i have so much time in my hands! I am on leave since friday! So im feeling awesome!!!

Ok bye!! (snickers)

It's DECEMBER! already?!!! OMAIGOD!

2010-12-01T23:42:00.005+08:00

OMAIGOD I LOOK SO AWESOME! YEAH! haha

Above is an old picture of me on the webcam. LOL i was soooo much innocent that time.

From yesterday's entry in regards of the book - MPH contacted me and adviced that they dont have the books, but will order from their vendor.

But they only have 2 books Johnny Be Good and Lucy in the Sky - but Chasing Daisy is OUT OF STOCK! WHATTTTTTTTT????

The price for me to purchase these books:

Johnny Be Good : RM57.50
Lucy in the Sky : RM50.50

Hmmmmmmm.....

I'm still @ the office sitting beside Azril. SO MUCH FUN! He just came back from 2 weeks of block leave! So many things

I'd like to thank Sachein + Mervyn for the dinner earlier! :)

Ok i have nothing else to update right now LOL.

I'm gonna die tomorrow....... grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr... xxx

p/s: OMG it's DECEMBER ALREADY?!!!!!! IT'S GONNA BE JANUARY SOOON!!! AND IM GONNA BE 29 FUCKING YEARS OLD!! WATTTTTTTTTTTTT??? (runs around naked and sobs @ the corner)

PAIGE TOON!

2010-11-30T16:11:00.008+08:00

THIS IS HER!! PAIGE TOON!!

I LOVE CHIC LITS!!! xxx

WHY IS IT SO BLOODY HARD FOR ME TO GET PAIGE TOON BOOKS!!! I have been prowling around book stores in town searching like MAD for paige toon's books!

I was introduced to Paige Toon's book a month ago while i was on my block leave, bought it on our Kuantan stop. I FELL IN LOVE IMMEDIATELY!

Konon-konon aku lah di tgh baca buku di tepi pantai.. Githewww...

The booooooooooooooooooooook is awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeeesomeeeeeeeee!!

My first Paige Toon book is "Pictures of Lily"

I REALLY LOVED IT! Aku sangatttttttttttttttt sukaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

I wanted to find her other 3 books

But now my problem is that i couldn't find any of her other books available here!!!!! NON!!!!

SO MACAM MANA NI????

Aku cari over Amazon.com , the 3 books equivalent to USD$6.93 BUT!!! 2 of the books can't be delivered outside of the US! WATTTTTTTTTTTT???? TAK ADIL!!!!!!! :(

Then i went to BetterWorldBooks.com and over there i was charged USD49.95!!! WATAFAKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!

Just got off the phone with MPH - asked them to check for me what's the price if i want to order these books.. THE SAD thing is that they said they will take bout 2-3 months for the books to arrive!! MANA BOLEH TAHAN TUNGGU LAMA SANGATTTTT!!!

OK2 i can't concentrate now, Veena is asking for my urgent assistance. Grrrrrrrrrr!!!!

Continue balik nanti xxxx

p/s: AKU NAK BUKU-BUKU NI LAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SOB SOB

Neyo - One In a Million

2010-11-30T01:35:00.005+08:00

Ok, i actually have LOADS to update! But it's 1:35am at the moment, and im still clearing my work emails. Like WATAFAKKKKKK!!!

Anyways, im listening to Neyo's One in a Million on repeat like for the gazillion times now. It's sooooo addictiveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!! The chorus part specially. (Of coz lah cos paling senang nak hafal - melalak nyanyi sambil pakai headphone kannnnn!! kahkahkah... sigh)

So I know the lyrics can be found as easy as typing it down @ google web browser, but i'm still sharing it here aaaaaaaaaaaanyways :p

SO here goes

Enjoy~~~ (dances around the room)

Oh yessss babaaaaaayyyyyy (dances some more and singing along)

Jet setter

Go getter

Nothing better

Call me Mr. been there done that

Top model chick to your every day hood rat

Less than all but more than a few

But I've never met one like you

Been all over the world

Done a little bit of everything

Little bit of everywhere

With a little bit of everyone

All the girls I've been with

Things I've seen it takes much to impress

But sure enough you go it makes your soul stand up from all the rest

Baby, I can be in love

But I just don't know

Baby one thing is for certain

Whatever you do it's working

All the girls don't matter

In your presence can't do what you do

There's a million girls around but I don't see no one but you

Girl you're so one in a million

You are

Baby you're the best I ever had

Best I ever had

And I'm certain that

There ain't nothing better

No there ain't nothing better than this

You're not a regular girl

You don't give a damn about your look

Talking about I can't do it for you

But you can do it for yourself

Even though that ain't so

Baby cause my dough don't know how to end

But that independent thing I'm with it

All we do is win baby

I could be in love

But I just don't know

Baby one thing is for certain

Whatever you do it's working

All the girls don't matter

In your presence can't do what you do

There's a million girls around but I don't see no one but you

Baby you're so one in a million

You are

Baby you're the best I ever had

Best I ever had

And I'm certain that

There ain't nothing better

No there ain't nothing better than this

Girl you're so one in a million

You are

Baby you're the best I ever had

Best I ever had

And I'm certain that

There ain't nothing better

No there ain't nothing better than this

Timing girl

Only one in the world

Just one of a kind

She mine

Ooh all that I can think about is what this thing could be

A future baby

Baby you're one of a kind

That means that you're the only one for me

Only one for me

Baby (girl) you're so one in a million

You are

Baby you're the best I ever had

Best I ever had

And I'm certain that

There ain't nothing better

No there ain't nothing better than this

Girl you're so one in a million

You are

Baby you're the best I ever had

Best I ever had

And I'm certain that

There ain't nothing better

No there ain't nothing better than this

Ryan James Yezak

2010-11-23T00:23:00.009+08:00

Adorable Ryan! xx

Ok, so today i want to introduce all of you with Ryan James Yezak.

I discovered him after talking to my colleague Cynthia earlier that day on Katy Perry's new song Peacock. She bluetoothed it to my cell phone. It was pretty catchy and before i knew it i was hooked before the day ended!

When i got back home i decided to find the video via YouTube - but there aren't any of Katy Perry's. I stumbled upon Ryan's video instead.

His videos are AMAZING! My favourite would be "PEACOCK" Please find the link below =)

The Awesome Video from Ryan James Yezak "PEACOCK" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3bRPHPQsOs

Pictures from the PEACOCK video

Ok, to be honest the only reason at the beginning stage i loved the song was because of the intro/chorus "I wanna see your pea-cock-cock-cock , You pea-cock-cock" LOL!!! And after watching Ryan's video it was impossible for me NOT to view it 5 times minimum a day. YES I STILL DO UNTIL TODAY!!!!

Sangat sangat comel kot gay2 ni semua. Omaigoshhhh sooo gorgeousss xxx

Why am i dedicating today's entry to him is because he's coming out with his new video "We R Who We R" from Ke$ha - and i just can't wait for it!!!

Pictures from We R Who We R video

My 2nd fav video from Ryan would be "California Gays" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kelUCEcdO8M

Ok im actually truly tired it's 12:35am at the moment and i have been up since 5:30am sigh~ went to work got stressed out, and Jeff picked me up from work and we went to have dinner + movie (Unstoppable -OMG MY HEART LITERALLY ALMOST STOPPED! I'd give 4 star for the movie!) and went back home - showered - shampoo'd - talking with Jeff for a little while - and now updating my blog - next would be sleep!!!! I need sleeeeeeeeeeep!!

I'm not looking forward for tomorrow. Im starting not to feel good, i can't read the future but i have the sense that tomorrow's not going to be a good day for me. Im such a mess.. Hmmm

Ok not to steal the spotlight away from Ryan, YOU GUYS NEED TO CHECK HIS YOUTUBE VIDEO OUT! http://www.youtube.com/user/RyanJamesYezak

I promise you his videos and video blogs are fabolous!!

Yes in case you are wondering Ryan IS gay, bad news to you girls but hey it's good news for the gays! :) Ok, i admit that in Malaysia it is still difficult for the community to accept homosexuals, but i have befriended with some of them - trust me they are special people and very brave as they accepted who they are - and are we doing the same thing towards ourselves?

Something to ponder on :) ..

So please do not judge anybody before you get to know them, as im sure you do not want to be treated such way too.

Ok i need my sleep now... xxxx sweet dreams all

Lux Addiction Phone Cases xx

2010-11-21T13:02:00.004+08:00

WOW! i had such a slow Saturday. I didnt get to have much sleep on the usual Monday to Friday so i will usually catch up on my sleep during the weekends. Yes i know it's u healthy to pile it up on the weekends - i'm working on it! hahaha

So yesterday i slept like for about 16 hours in total i guess, and woke up pretty early today. At the moment im reading Dorothy Koomson's "the ice cream girls" for the 2nd time. I really enjoy reading!!! yummmmm and eating famous amos cookies with no nuts in bed :D xx

I was corresponding with an old friend Suhana via Facebook, i really love her pictures and i noticed that she was holding quite a massive phone in one of her pictures, so i asked what phone was it -it was an Iphone but she bought a bling phone casing to glam it up! She gave me the website to look at and it's http://www.luxaddiction.com/ . OH MY GOD! I'M IN LOVE!!! The case costs about USD$79.95, it's handmade from Swarovski Cystals - the highest quality rhinestones. U can design/choose your own case cover for all phone/device models! Customise it to how you want it to look like! HOW AWESOME IS THAT?!!!

I swear to god if you have one of these casing! You'll stand out in the crowd! People would be asking where did you get it from! I'm not even sure if they have it in Malaysia yet! I AM GOING TO GET MYSELF ONE!! The case just clips on so you can put it on and take it off when you like, the case is a hard plastic clear type of case underneath!

You may go to http://www.youtube.com and type on "Lux Addiction" you will see there're a lot of videos and reviews on the phone casing!

My problem is that i might be upgrading my Blackberry 9700 soon, i love it YES, i REALLY REALLY LOVE IT! But i might be upgrading to another Blackberry - so if i spend for around USD$79.95 not including with shipping charges then it'll be a waste of money right? But it's made from SWAROVSKI CRYSTALS! OMG! I'm imagining on how it'll look good on my Blackberry and how glamorous i'd look like holding them to text people to BBM/PingChat/What's APP people or to call someone! Ghaa~~ YES IM GOING TO GET ONE! NUFF SAID! LOL

Once it's delivered to me, i'll take pictures and probably start sharing videos too! I have a youtube account yes but i'm just not too sure what to talk about in videos LOL.

Here im sharing some of the pictures that Suhana took of from her iphone casing

It' a combination of purple and black it's very very shiny and glamorous! Who wouldn't want one?!! OK i'm gonna share another Lux addiction case for blackberry phones that i screen captured from one of the reviews@ youtube

GORGEOUS!!! and this is the youtube review link that you can go and check it out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g6YbBabAp0g

This is all for this afternoon! I'm gonna get my sister some lunch and i'll write more soon! Sooo much things to share!!!! xxx

Mighty Long Time! - dedicated for my Musketeers!

2010-11-18T20:56:00.003+08:00

WOW!!! I havent been writing anything much for such a freaking long time!!!

I have been freaking busy with the commitment that was given to me since April and have been proving almost everyone including myself that i wasn't the wrong choice! that it was not a mistake! after 2 gruesome interviews i got it! Fair and square unlike some people :)

I have been missing my blog for some time - i really want to write but day comes and day goes by i had not much time to spend on my blogging. Yes im quite a heavy user for Facebook and twitter and that is only because i really don't need to write much! Only some limited alphabet numbers for the shout outs~ and yeah obviously by now most of you know just how much i enjoyyyyy to upload pictures, uploading via both FB and Twitter is much easier :).

I used to take a lot of my own pictures, yes i am vain - but i've not been for almost 2 years. I do still take my own picture but just not as much - cos i'm uglier compared to before. I should do something bout that hmmmm .. hahaha. Ok enough with the pity joke.

So, let me just update on my job. I'm still attached with Scope International @ PJ. SURPRISE! SURPRISE!! Yes i seriously surprise myself. For someone who sometimes like to give up at things as fast as a blink of an eye - i am still here working my ass off - building my own career in an honest way.

To be frank, what i want in the next 5 years is still a blur - like you know yeah i want to be someone successful and powerful. Someone respected. But in what field? what department? I have no bloody idea!! I'm freaking 28 years old and the road is still not clear.

This is seriously making me sad! When i was still in high school i thought i knew what i wanted in life - whom i wanted to be - but life is funny. Usually it doesn't end the way you wanted it too. Because of love i fucked my studies up (stupid yes i admit i was young back then shuddup LOL).

But from there - i told myself NEVER EVER will i be the joke EVER again! I will prove not only to myself but to those mother fuckers specially my awesome family that YES i am not such a loser! LOL.

Hmmm i'm actually still thinking whether there was a future for in Music if i have had studied harder and didn't fall for the bastard. Maybe... but you know there's a big difference with dreams and reality. Maybe i am meant to be exactly where i am exactly what i am doing at the moment. I just need to do some other papers outside so that it'll be easier for me to go for interviews and claim for the best position that i think i deserved.

So from having 15 to 16 people reporting under me now i have 7. They are awesome people! Attention seekers, work hard - party harder, friendly, and someone who aims high kind of people!. I enjoyed working with them for the past 7 months. They have taught me to be someone much better! The experience i will never ever forget!

From Left : Mochie, Veena, KK, Leya, Anne, Ezatul and Hazwan = My awesome Musketeers!

If it wasn't for them i'd go crazy! They are my honeys and they are also my poisons. Thank you for making me a better person you guys and i am PROUD of you because you guys always wanted to be the best and always worked hard! No matter what those jealous people are bullshitting bout you guys - you prove them wrong! Keep this up! Such an amazing journey so far :) Hope to see you guys grw to be an even better and powerful/influential person! Thumbs Up!

Today's entry i dedicate to them. Without them my life would be dull. Who would i scream at, Who would i laugh with and whom will i chase around the office? And yes most of them are vain too they like taking pictures and know how to have fun! Such awesome bunch! I am lucky :)

Sunday at Level 1 - LYL

2010-05-16T10:30:00.002+08:00

Aimran + Nadia + Errol + Bubu
Hani + Bubu

Reporting duty @ Level 1. OH SANGAT BOSAN OKAY! Now dah ngantok gila. I scanned these pictures that was pinned on a board and uploaded into my blog. So yeah these pictures was taken on an event hosted during Christmas time/New Years Eve.

Btw - i have to renew my passport ASAP!! Note to self!

Ok - im bored. CHOW!

Bloody P2

2010-05-01T12:55:00.003+08:00

My Place hoho

Luke looking pretty tired?

Sweet Aida xx

Bubu's place

Zul + Yatt (1)

Zul + Yatt (2)

Sasha

Shashi + Imah

Happy Labour Day

2010-05-01T11:35:00.002+08:00

Paper clipping on Jasvin's and Indy's wedding @ Kenya lol

Jasvin darling @ London

Miss you biyatch!! @ my kutti at London

Jasvin looking so happy! Mwah! xoxo @ London

Indy - the lucky guy who is Jasvin's hubby.

HAPPY LABOUR DAY TO ALL! And i'm at work! Hooray! LOL~

It's a beautiful sunny day - eventhough with only 2 hours of sleep i still manage to smile a lot - prolly because it's not a busy day. But i wish i was at home sleeping rather than in the office. LOL

But i guess, this is would be the sacrifice i need to do in order to achieve something better in the future. (Whoa! lol Ok i just wanted the MONEY - well i have extra needs! haha)

I REALLY MISS JASVIN! I've attached few pictures of her and her hubby @ London.

Thank god for technology - at least i still feel connected with her as we're communicating via email almost everyday (YES aku multi task okieee!! Not curik tulang. No No No hahaha~)

God life has been so literally honestly busy and packed for me to even consider to curik tulang like before.

Eventhough my body is bloody tired and tensed over it already but i'm determine to do it all and test my capability. I love to take on the challenge - eventhough at times i'll feel down - probably it's because when i need help but i dont get any - but i always manage to pick up myself back. By hook or by crook even how tired i am - i have no choice but to do it - that's life :)

Oh the drama! LOL. Yes DRAMAS! Sometimes i feel like my life is just like watching some comedy sitcom on TV. Sometimes i dont know what the heck happened the whole day - time flew and im still in dazed and sleep. Hahahaha! Maybe i need help (scratches head)

I actually am not sure how to send my message across on particular things - oh well, i guess i'll find the solution tomorrow (hopefully)

Im having so much fun doing work + listening to my IPOD. i took some pictures of the new bloody boring P2 office too! Will upload it in my next blog entry :D

ONCE AGAIN HAPPY LABOUR DAY TO ALL!!

JASVIN I MISS YOU!

TTFN!

Diarrhea Day II

2010-04-27T22:48:00.004+08:00

Gardenia's DELICIA Choco Raisin loaf + 4 cans of 100 plus! (My lunch + dinner)

The diarrhea i had today was awful! My stomache was killing me! :( sob sob and i puked 2 times. Oh the tortureeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!! I dont know what i ate wrong.

I was feeling uncomfortable pain around my abdomen area on Sunday - but then again Jeff wasn't affected. How comes? Since he ate the same thing as what i ate on Sat + Sun.

Sob~ btw i really love the choco raisin bread. It's yummy~

(carresses tummy gently) dear tummy, please stop giving me painful cramps.

Muffins from Bubu xoxo

2010-04-25T08:45:00.004+08:00

These muffins tastes heavenly delicious!!

Working on a Sunday literally is just so sad. Emotionally and Physically drained!

I had about few hours of sleep - and drove to work quite sleepy. Opened the schedule and i got PISSED! I can only view certain things - apparently it was saved that way yesterday. So i have to wait for the evening DM to come in and to alter it back and save from his Laptop - only then i can amend agent's adherence + ext. GHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

Then i proceeded to listen to my ipod (YES I HAVENT ADDED MUCH SONGS IN IT :( - Read yesterday's post. i stupidly synched it and deleted all my awesome 779 songs *CRIES*), opened my drawers - cos i remember Bubu did say he left me muffins inside. AND THERE IT WAS!!!

I thought that within 8 hours (MAX) it would be gone - as my place is a HOT PLACE for people to come and search for food .. so generally i thought people have eaten it, but NO! It's THERE! and it's SO LOVELY!

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww BUBU!!! Thank you darling! You definitely made my day.

Im sleepy - painted my nails and now i think i shall take a short nap.

What say you? :D

Hohohohhoo~~

MY IPOD!

2010-04-24T14:36:00.003+08:00

I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED ALL SONGS FROM MY IPOD! IM SOOOOO FREAKING UPSET RIGHT NOW! I HAD ONLY 1 WEEK OF GOOD TIMES LISTENING TO MY WELL ORGANISED FAB SONGS AND MY FUCKING HAND HAVE TO GO AND CLICK "SYNCH" IT!

IM UPSET I FEEL LIKE I WANNA SHOUT OUT LOUD AND JUST KILL ANYBODY!!!!

i think i definitely need to go for some CD shopping now, since the ones i had before was stolen by some bastard - 1 bloody case of it.

I'm SO upset about so many things!! I just want to dissapear - really.

A lot of things are seriously upsetting me.

Even how hard i want to make everything seems Okay~ everything will surely fuck up. "Life with Passion" Oh god! I cant honestly think anything in my life at the moment to be celebrating and partying about!!

Hidup aku memang sangat malang~ im tired of feeling pity to myself. Im tireddddddddddddd of all this! IM TIRED!!!

I hate my life!

$258M jackpot winner! OMG!

2010-04-23T23:45:00.004+08:00

Mo. clerk says he'll use $258M jackpot on bills

Ok, i saw this report @ Yahoo.com. If it was me i would say the FIRST thing he SHOULD do after he cash in the bloody $258M is to do some massive construction job on his face. LOL

Hmm yeah i know that was mean. OK I ADMIT! I AM JEALOUS!! Like whaaaaaaaaaaaat??!!!!

Oh godddddddddddd!! I can't imagine what I'd do if it was me who won the money money money~

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm (day dreaming) sob sob sob. HOW I WISH!!!

Click here to read it all The bastard who won $258M jackpot - Yes im jealous

Hahahaa!!

I'd have plenty stocks of dildos and vibrators! Then i can give each of my horny friends one! Life would be good after that. LOL!

Yes im talking crap again. Oh hell~ shrugs...

Kardashian by bebe Hits Stores 22.04

2010-04-23T23:05:00.004+08:00

OHHHH i loiiiiiiiiiiiiiike!!! Go visit

Khloe Karhashian

It's FAB!!!!!!

Kepala bingit!

2010-04-20T23:20:00.004+08:00

OH sgt gedik muka aku. Di dagu itu adalah cakaran yg aku dpt lepas bergaduh LOL!

Aku memang TERROR! (prahsan~)

Having fun emailing with my girls Afie & Mel kechik. OH GOD! i'll be moving to Level P2 starting this coming Saturday!! I got SO MANY THINGSSSSSSSSSSSSS i can't moooooooove!, and furthermore the seating arrangement is BS! I dont have my own private space to put all my cute colourful things! Sob~ I'll be just the same with everyone - plain :( ..

I havent got my bloody laptop yet, so im quite pissed with the fact that i can't archive my email !! and temporarily i'm gonna be using new PC & CPU at P2. OHHHHHH THE TORTUREEEEEEE!!

Why can't it just be SIMPLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!

The trip to BANGKOK (BANG COCK? LOL) is cancelled due of the bloody riots over there - with people wearing yellow and red shirts!! 19 people died last 2 weeks because of the demonstration. There'll be another one this weekend too .. GHAAAAAAAA!! But to be honest i dont mind at all, as i prefer the beach - island - than shopping (OH IS IT? LOL!) UNLESS!! If it's shopping in an island or near the beach.. HEAVENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!~~~

I miss Jasvin :( When lah aku akan banyak sgt duit boleh berenjoy pegi London and merayap2 around Europe dgn kekasih hati skali. Sigh~ it's ok. it's good to dream and work hard to achieve it!

YESSSSSSSSS!! I AM FULL OF POSITIVITYYYYYYYYYYYYY (at times.. LOL)

Aku mmg sgt lawak okay!!! SAIKO!

Kepala aku tgh denyut2 kesakitan - penat ah tu. tension~~~ (eh tadi kata positive then tiba2 tension pulak? Mmg DRAMA sgt! LOL)

Can't wait to go yumcha with Afie + Mel after work @ 12am!

BYE BYE FOR NOW!

8 Dating Mistakes Even Smart Women Make

2010-04-18T23:54:00.002+08:00

Copied from Yahoo.com!

Trying to make your new relationship last or just looking to avoid a repeat of your latest dating mistakes? Follow our guide to finding Mr. Right. (No, it’s not impossible!)

Dating Mistake #1: Being Too Available

We’re not suggesting you play games, but we are telling you to indulge your passions and resist the urge to abandon your social circle every time your new man sends an invitation. Take Sebastian, 34, from Chicago, for example: “When I was single, there were women I initially liked who seemed to be waiting by the phone for me to call, which let me know if I didn’t meet someone else I wanted to date, I had a standby. There just wasn’t anything to work for, and that turned me off,” he says. The more you engage in and enjoy your life, the more he’ll work to be a part of it.

Dating Mistake #2: Trying to Rehabilitate a Bad Boy

Ending a relationship is rarely easy, and though flying solo might not be your long-term goal, being on your own is better than feeling alone in a relationship with someone who treats you poorly. Even when it might be tempting to give a toxic romance one more try, knowing when to cut your losses and move on leaves you available and baggage-free when the right guy comes along.

Dating Mistake #3: Looking for Perfection

Encouraging you to settle isn’t our style, but separating your desires from your deal-breakers can give your love life a major upgrade. “There are some qualities that your mate must have—being honest, for example—and others, such as movie-star looks, that should be thrown in the would-be-nice category,” says Elizabeth R. Lombardo, Ph.D., “Sit down and realistically figure out what characteristics are nonnegotiable and then be open-minded about the rest.”

Dating Mistake #4: Feeling Sorry for Yourself

Resist the urge to bemoan your single status (which will only make him wonder why you find yourself such terrible company) and use this time to date yourself. Taking a dance class at the local studio, hitting up the exhibit you have been aching to see and trying out the new wine bar on the corner will not only offer you the chance to have more fun but will also leave you more likely to meet someone who shares your interests. So much better than sitting in your apartment waiting for someone to “wink” at your online profile picture, isn’t it? Another bonus? You’ll have far more interesting things to talk about over dinner than what your boss made you do on your lunch break last Friday.

Dating Mistake #5: Knowing His Thread-Count Before You Know His Phone Number

Getting it on with a sexy stranger is your natural-born right, but according to many guys, it can be the wrong move if you’re looking for long-term love.
Follow the advice of super-sexy leading man Gilles Marini (he was Samantha’s sexy neighbor in Sex and the City: The Movie): “Men love women who respect themselves and who do not rush into bed with them but instead go on a few dates, where they can start to gain an understanding of each other and then decide whether or not to take things further. Women need to know that taking it slow and getting to know one another is the best way to get into a good relationship,” he says.

Dating Mistake #6: Being Too Selfish in Your Relationship

One of the downsides of being independent is that it can lead to some self-absorbed tendencies—a huge turnoff for men looking for a serious relationship, says Ming Gregory, a professional matchmaker at Color Blind International Dating Service. So make sure you’re giving as much as you’re receiving in your next relationship. “A partnership involves two people who share mutual interests and mutually benefit one another,” she says. “It’s not just about what being with him can provide you; it’s about how you can come together to complement each other.”

Dating Mistake #7: Believing in The One

“A lot of women make dating more difficult by placing so much pressure on themselves to find the one-and-only-man-in-a-billion they believe is right for them,” says Ali, 35, from Gaithersburg, Maryland.

Instead of convincing yourself the ex you dumped was your soul mate or that perfect-but-married co-worker was your one that got away, take a cue from our male counterparts and approach the dating scene with the idea that there are plenty of men who are capable of making you laugh, sharing your values and melting your heart, and you’re going to have fun with several of them until you find one worthy of your commitment.

Dating Mistake #8: Forgetting Your Manners

We can’t imagine this is something you’d ever do, but a little reminder never hurts: Say thank you.

“Good manners have become so old-fashioned that men now wait for the thank-you at the end of the date as a way to see if she’s worth seeing again,” says Brian, 30, from New York City. “I don’t care if the woman looks like Kate Beckinsale and has a Ph.D.; if she can’t be bothered to utter those two little words, I am never calling her again.”

Acronyms. Like WTF?

2010-04-18T22:51:00.007+08:00

Oh! Aku mmg sgt lapar okayyyyyyyyyyyy!! :(

So, last Friday me and my old team (Team Bravo - with Edwin) went for our team outing dinner at Armada Hotel; PJ. Dinner buffet. I had lots of fun! I skipped work for 2 hours - Poor faizul had to take care of the floor while i was out eating like a pig and smoke like nobody's business hahaha.

We had this conversation about acronyms. It amazes me of how some people are not familiar with them. Like for instance when we send out emails to the floor about some information that they need to know. We'll just forward it with the message "FYA" or "FYI"

Ok they obviously know what FYI means. But not FYA. I was like "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!!!"

And we're living in the 21st century? Suddenly i felt so hipped and young! LOL.

Oh yeah they dont even know what LOL is. OMG!! I nearly fainted!

BTW, they thought that FYA - was something like Fuck You Asshole or something like that.

Hahahha made me ROTFLMAO!!

I have a few of acronyms that i'd like to share

AAMOF – As A Matter Of Fact
AFAIK – As Far As I Know

AFAIC – As Far As I’m Concerned

AFAICT – As Far As I Can Tell

AFK – Away From Keyboard

ASAP – As Soon As Possible

ASL – Age,Sex,Location

BAG – Big @ss Grin

BAK – Back At Keybo

BBL – Be Back Later

BF – BoyFriend

BFD – Big Fricken Deal

BITMT – But In The Meantime

BOT – Back On Topic

BRB – Be Right Back

BSEG – BIG Sh*t Eat’n Grin

BTW – By the way

C4N – Ciao For Now

CRS – Can’t Remember “Stuff”

CU – See You

CUL8R – See You Later

CWOT – Complete Waste Of Time

CYA – See Ya

DIY – Do It Yourself

EOD – End Of Discussion

EZ – Easy

F2F – Face To Face

FAQ – Frequently Asked Questions

FBOW – For Better Or Worse

FOAF – Friend Of A Friend

FOCL – Falling Off Chair Laughing

FWIW – For What It’s Worth

FYA – For Your Amusement/ For Your Action / For Your Attention

FYI – For Your Information

GA – Go Ahead

GAL – Get A Life

GBTW – Get Back To Work

GF – Girlfriend

GFC – Going For Coffee

GFETE – Grinning From Ear To Ear

GMTA – Great minds think alike

GR&D – Grinning, Running & Ducking

GTG – Got To Go

GTGTTBR – Got To Go To The Bathroom

GTRM – Going To Read Mail

GU – Geographically Undesirable

H8 – Hate

HAND – Have A Nice Day

HHOK – Ha Ha Only Kidding

HTH – Hope This Helps

IAC – In Any Case

IAE – In Any Event

IANAL – I am not a lawyer

IC – I See

IDC - I Dont Care

IDGI – I Don’t Get It

IDK- I Don't Know

IK - I know

IMCO – In My Considered Opinion

IMHO – In my humble opinion

IMNHO – In my NEVER humble opinion

IMNSHO – in My Not So Humble Opinion

IMO – In My Opinion

IMPE – In My Personal Experience

IMVHO – In My Very Humble Opinion

IOW – In Other Words

IRL – In Real Life

ISP – Internet Service Provider

IYKWIM – If You Know What I Mean

JIC – Just In Case

J/K – Just kidding

KISS – Keep It Simple Stupid

L8R – Later

LOL – Laughing Out Loud

LMAO – Laughing My Arse Off

LMFAO – Laughing My F*cking Arse Off

LTNS – Long Time No See

MorF – Male or Female

MTCW – My Two Cents Worth

NBD – No Big Deal

NRN – No Reply Necessary

NTK – Need To Know

NOYB - Non Of Your Business

ONNA – Oh No, Not Again!

OTOH – On The Other Hand

OTTOMH – Off the top of my head

OIC – Oh I See

OTF – On The Floor

OLL – Online Love

OMG - Oh My God/Oh My Gosh

PITA – Pain In The @ss

PLS – Please

PSTFU – Please…Shut The Fuck Up

PU – That Stinks!

REHI – Hello Again (re-Hi!)

RL – Real Life

ROFL – Rolling On Floor Laughing

ROTF – Rolling On The Floor

ROTFL – Rolling On The Floor Laughing

ROFLMAO - ROLLING ON FLOOR LAUGHING MY ARSE OFF

RSN – Real Soon Now

RTDox – Read The Documentation

RTFM – Read The Frickin’ Manual

RUOK – Are You OK?

RW – Real World

TTYL- Talk To You Later

TANSTAAFL – There Ain’t No Such Thing As A Free Lunch

TAFN – That’s All For Now

TEOTWAWKI – The End Of The World As We Know It

TMI – Too Much Information

TTFN – Ta Tah For Now

TY – Thank You

WEG – Wicked Evil Grin

WTF – What The Fuck

YW – Your Welcome

OMG That's A lot! TMI!!. TAFN! Im tired AND hungry. I should just STFU - HTH! . TTFN!

Ngantok!!

2010-04-17T00:09:00.005+08:00

NGANTOK!!!!

BYE!!!

Happy weekend!! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee~~~

Mabuk?? Adakah? Oh tidak! :p

Questionaire! - Oh banyak masa eh aku?

2010-04-14T22:17:00.006+08:00

1) Do you think you're hot?

- Uhmm yeah? Duh! CONFIDENT U OLLS! Mak kan DIVA githeewwww LOL

2) Upload your favorite picture of you!

- Oh god! Im such a CAM WHORE so i got like gazillion favourite pictures of myself and it is SO hard to chooooooose!! Hmmmmm oh god! i can't pick one! Why not u check yourself at my FB account. I have some few thousands there... :D

3) Why do you like that picture?

- Oh shit! I still need to choose 1 is it now? Hmmm Ok lemme see. Damn ok to be honest im at the office at the moment - so i dont have much pictures that i can choose - just lemme browse through --

Ok this would be my fav that i have IN my office PC!

i LIKE this picture is because at this point of time i was SUPER OBSESSED WITH GREEN! and i was wearing green eyeshadow! Can you see it? Please say YES! and i actually look sweet + gedik here :D :D

4) When was the last time you ate pizza?
- been some time - i guess it was Domino's last month with Hani, Izrul and Azril (some time lah konon. padahal last month? KAHKAHKAH)

5) The last song you listened to?
- Andrea Bocelli - The Prayer (Oooooh i love! - it's in my I-pod! :D)

6) What are you doing right now besides this?
- TAHAN KENCING!! Weeeeeeeeeee~~

7) What name would you prefer besides yours?
- None. I love my name :)

People To Tag

1) Jeff!
2) My Girls - Jas,Hani,Suzie,Mei Kuan! (wah sekumpulan teros!)
3) Mochie + Bubu (wah berduet ke?)
4) My Awesome team
5) My Beloved Family <3

8) Who is number one?
- My eternal love :)

9) Number three is having a relationship with?
- uhhhhh each other? Githeww.. well they're both single and DEFINITELY LOOKING!!

10) Say something about number five?
- I love them to DEATH! They're my blood :)

11) How about number four?
- They're my awesome team . I will love them, nurture and guide them to be the best that they can as i do believe in my heart - that they are THE BEST! - inside and outside. No matter what other people say guys. YOU ARE THE BEST! FUCK THE REST!!!! Yeah!! :D

Post entry from Bubu Cabana - FUNNY LOL!

2010-04-14T22:11:00.002+08:00

Kau memang LAHA

Kawan aku sampai, so aku pun naik.

The weather was awesome, so kawan2 aku tak pasang penghawa dingin dan membuka tingkap kereta merasa breeze petang yang sejuk tp panas skit tak panas sangat tapi still panas lah.

Aku duduk di belakang, kawan lelaki aku teman kawan perempuan yang memandu kereta.

"Pasang air-cond boleh tak?"

"ok" jawab kawan lelaki aku sambil sibuk mencari CD untuk di pasang ke radio.

CD di pasang.

Penghawa dingin masih belum di pasang.

"Air-cond, please?"

"Jap lah" still bz mencari track di dalam CD itu.

Aku pun tunggu.Music di mainkan.

"Damn you's a sexy beach, sexy beach"

Aku panas, dah la lagu mcm bongok.

"Panas weh, pasang air-cond boleh tak?"

"Ni kan Akon? Nak lagu yang manaa?"

I blame the Illuminati for this on?

- HAHAHAHHAHA memang sgt LAWAK OKAY! TAK TAHAN MAK GELAK NOKS!!

Live with Passion?

2010-04-14T21:22:00.004+08:00

LIVE WITH PASSION!

Wahh githew kan statement "LIVE WITH PASSION". Actually, it is a statement that i strongly agree - been doing that since i know how tough life is. But then again at times i can't tahan lah kan - bila situasi tu mmg tersangatnya LAHANAT. Memang lah aku bertukar jadi GODZILA! and membenci semua makhluk and benda di dunia ini! Sangat OVER okay!

SO macam mana? Sangat sarcastic okay! ( Mochie punya ayat LOL)

Here i am - sitting at my place wondering WHAT THE HELL am i doing?! I mean am i actually happy with what im doing? Im definitely NOT happy with the pay. But to think positive and following the statement of LIVE WITH PASSION. I'll take the necessary experience which will help me in my future life - perhaps? Oh sangat ragu2 eh.. LOL

So the trip to Bangkok is postponed to another date due of the riots going on there. It's pretty creepy! But im glad it's being postpone - most definitely!

Now im thinking where to go on my block leave on June! DAMN i can't wait to be out of office for 2 bloody weeks!!

Just came back from the pantry - saw my 2 little devils Bubu and Mochie checking out their FB and myspace account. I had the sudden feeling of wanting to check my MySpace account - and so i did. MAN I MISS MYSELF WHEN I WAS KURUS!!! SOB SOB SOBBBBBBBBBBBBB

Oh i remember my last post something bout not eating snacks ... well it worked only for 4 days. IM SUCH A FAILURE! sob sob sob.

I need someone or something to make me want to actually DO something about it, but then again it's all up to myself right?

Oh hell im freaking out already! :( Farah!!! LIVE WITH PASSION PLEASE!!!!

Ok - im freaking out still. Gotta go for a smoke. Ghaaaaaaaaaaa!!

Purplish day but still was feeling so blue~

2010-04-06T22:27:00.005+08:00

Purple Me!

SLEEPY! MOUNTAINS OF ESCALLATION CALLS DONE~!

Hungry! but trying to cut down the eating late night snacks - or snacks in general.

I managed to sleep for only 2 hours lastnight. Thanks to the swap of shift from early in the morning to the evening.

And also i forgot to thank my staff - txt'd me at 6:30 in the morning to tell me that they are planning to take MC and when i txt'd back that he/she has taken MC almost every week, then he/she replied that if it's OK if he/she enters late. Meaning? He/She wasnt even sick? Probably he/she just woke up late? Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!

Oh god today is such a horrible day! :(

hungry and missing someone badly :(

Wow! After SO long!

2010-04-06T01:57:00.002+08:00

I havent been writing here for some time. Yeah i have been quite busy and all that.

1st things 1st - bout the interview for the Manager roll that i went. I got it Alhamdulillah.

April 1st i start to have about 16 people reporting under me. Bit pressured but i know i can do it, I have been doing it before but only now with a new title.

Lots of hard work and new responsibility but i've expected that and i embrace it with a smile in my face. I do still tend to get all moody at times. Oh heck Im a diva.. so? Mood Swings are expected! Hahahahhaa~

2nd thing - this whole month i'm assigned to be working evening from 4pm - 12am. It's hard! Since i've been waking up 5 am for the past 4 months! :( but i wont accept defeat and negetivity!

Oh god! this is such a boring entry! :(

What else for me to quickly update.. hmm...

Oh yeah i have a new resolution. Im scared of it but i guess i have no choice but to do it.. :(

Will i be strong? (crosses fingers)

I have been falling sick constantly for the past 1 month, and its making me feel so tired. From fever, stomach aches, head-splitting headaches .. minor asthma attacks. Really making me sad. Specially at night when i just have to force myself to sleep even when i feel like dying. Sometimes i am scared that if this would be my last sleep? There are so many things i want to still achieve and do and change. Im typing nonsense now.

I have this ugly scars on my thighs - about a week ago, i was having lunch at this stall and it rained heavily after that so me and my colleagues had to run for our dear life back to our office - and i took the shortcut (which i thought was pretty smart at that time) and scratched myself with some plant. I felt the pain and checked my thigh - nothing was wrong so i ignored it.

Bout 10 minutes after when i was in a meeting (body all wet - literally) the pain on my thigh were unbearable so i looked at it again and i was bleeding like mad! :( it was such a scary sight :(

and now im having a hideous scar :( :(

God im sleepy! And im writing rubbish..

My life has been so twisted as day goes by.

I hope that the turning point of my life has started.

Wish me all the best.